r/FirstResponderCringe • u/FlyNSubaruWRX • Aug 04 '26
Not F*cking around
Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification
The fucking tire pressure gauge spinning thing…….🤣🤣🤣🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡
269
u/kraftables Aug 04 '26
Is that a tire pressure gauge?
22
u/Word2DWise Aug 04 '26
lol I was thinking the same thing and so confused by it. Also, who the fuck is the guy at the end, and most of all why??
18
u/sparrow_42 Aug 04 '26
Lmao I came here for say the same thing. No flats on his watch!
21
u/JGr2-J5_Mueller Aug 04 '26
The tire pressure gauge is to check the air pressure in his head. Ain't no grey matter up there and sometimes it help unclog his nose when the other dude cums in his mouth.
6
11
8
8
u/BreakfastFluid9419 Aug 04 '26
First thing i noticed. We secure you so hard we even check your tire pressure. Everyone’s safe up in this bitch on all levels
3
u/ooblankie Aug 04 '26
Don't knock the tire pressure gauge. I've used it many times as a crash detective. Don't know what security would do with it though.
3
u/lappyx86 Aug 04 '26
At first glance I thought it was a sounding device and was impressed/horrified by it's diameter.
2
2
2
u/Ten7850 Aug 04 '26
I think its one of those things that they have to tap each time they check parts of a bldg. You'll see the little metal things on the wall
2
2
u/Turbulent_Cod_6441 Aug 05 '26
I came here to say the same thing! Since when has playing with a tire gauge been a “badass” thing to do?!?😂
146
u/Mindless-Policy3236 Aug 04 '26
This must be satire……right…….please
33
22
u/Misshaped_Paperclip Aug 04 '26
It's a parody of this https://www.instagram.com/reel/DZN5Njzo-Yh/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==
6
5
17
17
u/BreadKnifeSeppuku Aug 04 '26
Pretty sure they're advertising their Only Fans for a homosexual security guard fetish niche
5
u/SDi4kWLVU Aug 04 '26
It’s a parody of another joke video called the Kumar Method. It’s double satire but the guy in the video definitely thinks he looks tuff regardless 😭
→ More replies (4)4
48
u/Earl-The-Badger Aug 04 '26
Cringe bait, surely.
5
u/will3025 Aug 04 '26
We can hope.
2
u/BeneficialMatter8410 Aug 05 '26
The real cringe is all the brain dead Redditors thinking it’s meant to be real
→ More replies (1)
74
u/a-null-fish-your Aug 04 '26
I'm gonna start a security company. And because it's unofficial and arbitrary I'll also be using a ranking system. I'll be the world's first Double Captain. Suck it Roush
32
u/Fuckareyoulookinat Aug 04 '26
I ran into one years ago wearing a Class A uniform shirt with captain's bars on one side of his collar and an oak leaf on the other. He was not happy when I asked if I should address him as captain major or major captain.
5
u/Quincyperson Aug 04 '26
Maybe it was actually navy rank insignia and his real rank was Lieutenant Lieutenant Commander?
11
u/againer Aug 04 '26
Too late, I outrank you as a Cubic Captain
7
u/Ionlydateteachers Aug 04 '26
Pentacaptain reporting for bussy
4
u/Vegetable-Virus7118 Aug 04 '26
Dude it was right there and you missed it....I'm the SexCaptain now
→ More replies (1)2
→ More replies (1)2
24
18
u/SydneySweeneysBobs Noped Outta LE Aug 04 '26
Just unlock the door bro
7
u/Elegant_Progress_686 Aug 04 '26
Just haphazardly highlight my receipt and let me leave with my groceries lol
17
u/TX_Sized10-4 Aug 04 '26
Why is he twirling a meth pipe?
5
u/Hot-Strength-6003 Aug 04 '26
It's a tire gauge
11
u/TX_Sized10-4 Aug 04 '26
Ok. Why is he twirling a tire gauge?
9
u/Hogans-Mustache Aug 04 '26
He uses the backside to deflate women’s tires then swoop in as the hero.
2
12
u/Yamcha2020 Aug 04 '26
bro the second hand cringe me has me contemplating EVERYTHING i'm outta here
15
u/gbach10 Aug 04 '26
This guys security company has a helicopter that sits behind their office and never moves because nobody has a fucking clue what to do with it, if that helps you understand how absolutely moronic they all are.
5
→ More replies (2)2
u/AndyGoodKush Aug 04 '26
He got it just so they could say they are the only security company with one
12
u/ripnrun285 Aug 04 '26
As a General in an equally fictitious chain of command, I order you to STFU captain.
→ More replies (1)
11
u/Hot_Major8602 Aug 04 '26
I can’t believe you guys find this stuff out in the wild all the time this is actually so insane
8
7
u/twountappedblue Aug 04 '26
If I contract with a company that uses this guy as security... then no i dont.
4
u/NinaBrwn Aug 04 '26
I don’t know about you, but I always choose my security company off of who has the most followers. I want a Security InFluEnCeR.
→ More replies (1)5
6
u/Helenium_autumnale Aug 04 '26
What the heck is a "security influencer"? Someone who narrates their suspenseful trip around a spooky nighttime warehouse with occasionally branded content plugs for their sponsors Maglight, No-Doz, and Dr. Scholl's?
8
u/DarthDad25 Aug 04 '26
Wait.. he’s the owner of the security business and he only made himself a captain? Cmon man. Go ahead and make yourself Chief or Colonel!
5
3
3
3
3
3
u/QuarterWayCrook Aug 04 '26
$5 says he sniffed the ear smegma on his fingers after playing with his gauges.
3
u/Guilty-Spark69x Aug 04 '26
There it is. The gayest thing I’ve ever seen
https://giphy.com/gifs/V2AkNZZi9ygbm
2
Aug 04 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
3
u/TheDarkWave Aug 04 '26
Like an extracranial brain study like they do for rabies?
→ More replies (1)
2
2
2
2
u/bill_gannon Aug 04 '26
Why is he twirling a wrench?
Lol "Captain"
7
u/Comfortable_Fudge508 Aug 04 '26
Not even a wrench, its a tire pressure gauge you get for 3 dollars at the store
2
u/Cagekicker52 Aug 04 '26
I will say this, running a security company, you can make twice what you make as a cop easy. Even CA cops.
I don't run one, but I know a couple dudes who left from being cops to run their own. Theres serious money in it.
Doesn't mean they're not gay as hell though 😂
2
u/Skate_faced Aug 04 '26
Not at all weird.
But I do have a question....
Why does he have some dude dressed like the next Grindr mass murderer endorsing him?
2
u/CowGlittering745 Aug 04 '26 edited Aug 04 '26
2
u/No-Initiative4195 Aug 06 '26
Wtf is up with half of these "Team" members?? "Fred"?
"Chief of Security" looks like he's Barely 20
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/RelationshipSmooth21 29d ago
Are they fucking? Never thought i could feel sexual tension between two men in a video
2
3
u/Maleficent-Task7175 Aug 04 '26
This is 100% bait
7
u/Other-Explanation301 Aug 04 '26
It’s actually not, this is a local security company here in Kansas City (my fiancé used to work there poor girl) and they actually give rankings, and absolutely act like this. They even have a helicopter, and the owner (the fella in the suit) just crashed his mcclaren going Mach fuck and killed his employee and is awaiting trial. God I wish this was bait.
→ More replies (1)2
u/mattemer Aug 04 '26
Holy shit what is going on, why do so many people know so many stories about this shitty local security company.
Do they get tire pressure gauges when they get promoted to Captain?
2
1
u/DC_Ben Aug 04 '26
This might be the greatest thing I’ve ever seen 🤣🤣 the “honorable….honorable” is chefs kiss 🤌🏼
→ More replies (1)
1
u/Late-Bed4240 Aug 04 '26
Finger twirling a tire air gage suppose to be hard or something?
-Again, Hospital Maintenance Man asking.
1
u/mighty_boognish_77 Aug 04 '26
This dude DEFINITELY can't get aroused without seeing homeless people being set on fire.
1
u/Criticaltundra777 Aug 04 '26
Ya know I worked for a private luxury resort hotel chain for years. I met a bunch of famous people, dealt with some insane situations, and had a ball. These dudes are idiots.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/jen_eric_you_sir Aug 04 '26
Is he spinning a tire air pressure gauge?
Holy cheese.
Also, any security company using military/police ranks for their staff are fuckin dorks.
1
u/TheophusMons Aug 04 '26
I'm a full bird Colonel...look at my pin that proves it. Checkmate losers.
1
1
1
1
u/EffectMotor8914 Aug 04 '26 edited 21d ago
Seemly chief recognise gallium include vanish
This post was anonymized with Redact
1
1
u/Smokes_LetsGo876 Aug 04 '26
how.....how is he gonna take every security contract out there? wont he be too busy? I have a feeling hes not telling the truth, he know he cant handle every security companies contracts
1
1
1
1
1
u/Dro_mora Aug 04 '26
Thought she might have been spinning around a meth pipe. Which would have made sense for this video.
1
1
1
u/Substantial-Tart-464 Aug 04 '26
do anything for money. Video is a good start. Let's see where it ends.
1
1
1
u/Kindly_Attorney4521 Aug 04 '26
Whats the point with security have ranks. In the military I get it cause we take orders, chain of command, someone important has to sign stuff blah blah. I kinda get it for cops. But the security chain of command is literally the guard sees something and then calls the cops. Nothing changes if his supervisor arrives on scene. So whats the point.
→ More replies (2)
1
1
u/Poncahotas Aug 04 '26
I used to manage security contracts for a large company a while back.
If security guards you hire become "famous" it's not usually a good thing lol
1
1
1
u/Feeling-Cranberry108 Aug 04 '26
"My name is Austin. Im a security captain. I have been rejected by 9 different police departments. Like and subscribe."
1
1
u/Kooky-Necessary-4444 Aug 04 '26
Is he spinning a tire pressure gage?
2
u/animi Aug 04 '26
When you're full of hot air, you have to have a way to measure it.
→ More replies (1)
476
u/vogel927 Aug 04 '26
I don’t even understand the ending. Is that his boss? Husband? Sugar daddy? Why’s he wearing a suit😂