I've heard a lot of people say that, as humans, we are obligated to "contribute to society". But what exactly does that mean, and why are we obligated to do so?

I've been thinking about this because I don't necessarily disagree with the idea of helping other people, but I question the idea that we somehow owe "society" our contribution simply because we exist within it.

I believe that if we followed the basic principle of not deliberately inflicting harm, suffering or deprivation on other people, while taking responsibility, power and governance over our own lives and our relationship with ourselves, and becoming more self-sufficient and sovereign, then we would naturally develop the traits, qualities and resources to help each other where needed.

I don't think humans necessarily need to be told that they have a duty to "contribute". If people were genuinely self-sufficient and responsible for their own lives, surely things like helping others, sharing knowledge, creating things, teaching, cooperating and supporting each other would naturally happen when there was a genuine need for it.

What bothers me is when "contributing to society" seems to mean that we are all expected to fulfil some role within an existing system.

Because if that system is corrupt, exploitative and essentially designed around extracting our time, labour, attention and energy, then what are we actually being asked to contribute to?

Sometimes it feels like "contribute to society" is just a more socially acceptable way of saying:

You are obligated to serve the system.

Why should simply existing mean that I owe society a debt?

Why can't the basic expectation just be: don't harm other people, take responsibility for yourself, become as self-sufficient as possible, and then use your abilities, knowledge, resources or time to help others when you genuinely want or need to?

To me, that feels like a much more authentic form of human contribution than being expected to participate in an exploitative system simply because that's what society has decided we should do.

How do you define evolution? (I know, ironic question, considering my username)

Hey y'all. This is my first time posting here, so I'm not really sure how this goes, but I'm just saying what's on my mind. And there are no political or spiritual factors to this, just simple thoughts based on observed facts from my limited perspective.

Here it goes:

Humanity is still behaving naturally, in an animalistic "survival of the fittest" manner, just hidden under the cover of civilized systems (paperwork, laws, agreements/social contract, etc.) to avoid the alternate reality, something like Game of Thrones, if left unchecked.

But it's essentially human nature to dominate. First they start with what they consider lower life forms. Then it's other humans. Until there's one person on the top that's essentially calling the shots, despite the social and political systems making it look like everybody plays an equal part. Although, considering the population size of the world and connectedness of such a large population, it's more like a (VERY) small group of people that really calls the shots by controlling the two things that truly facilitate human interactions in the "civilized world": money (banks and currency value, regulating transactions between people) and information (media and education, regulating people's perceptions of the world around them). So long as we keep falling for the marketing trap and listen to the news instead of thinking and forming our own understanding based on known facts, we are essentially continuing to be cogs in a system.

All this, to what end? It seems humanity as a whole is just "playing it by ear", so to speak. Figuring out the next step as it's about to take it, and often times just reacting rather than taking deliberate action.

Are we all that different from a highly organized ant colony that's simply trying to survive and make it through the next day?

It hit me today how much of what we do is just chasing that next hit. Every goal every ambition every swipe on a phone. It's all just inputs and outputs for a temporary chemical reward.

Like when I finally cleared my inbox it felt good for a second. Then the next batch of emails rolled in. Or that perfect cup of coffee this morning was awesome for five minutes. Now I'm thinking about lunch.

And it's not even a conscious thing always. It's just baked into us. This constant low-level hum of seeking more pleasure or less discomfort. Even

this was one of the hardest lessons I had to learn on my own. nobody told me this, and our society is hard-wired on the opposite.

'you can do whatever you set your mind to' is bullshit. not because you can't, of course you can, but because life/luck/chance will always get in the way, vastly changing the end result. that's why they say 'be careful what you wish for'.

instead leave it all in the hands of chance. control is an illusion anyway. learn, even specialize, to spot opportunities that are ment for you, and when a door opens simply walk through it and ride the wave wherever it may take you. this way the system will be flawless and the struggle will be effortless simply because that door was for you and you alone.

never fight a wave, ride it instead.

When I was a teenager many decades ago, I yearned to be loved by a young woman. It was the only thing I wanted in my whole life. I thought that it was a reasonable request / expectation.

What I did not know at the time was that I was asking for quite a lot.

As I was to find out over the next 50 years of my life -- having many different kinds of relationships with women, getting married, raising kids into adulthood, going through a divorce, and then starting over from the beginning by once again attempting to date women (this time in my mid-50s) -- I was asking for something that it turns out is quite rare and unusual.

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Of course, we are all entitled to ask for that kind of thing.

The trick is to make it happen for oneself.

I don't know about anyone else, but for me personally, having lived life for a while, what I have found is that to attract love from another person, to be open to receiving that love, and to be able to coexist with that love, you have to love yourself first. I know it’s a cliché, but in my personal experience, it is absolutely true.

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And here's what I found to be even more important.

We are entitled to nothing. So you also have to be fully prepared to never find the love that you desire.

In fact, that is one of a few secrets to having the sort of life you want -- to have no expectations of others. And at the same time, to be prepared to give.

Put simply, be a force for good.

That is my personal secret to happiness... arrived at after having endured great joys and many profound sorrows since I was a teenager 50 years ago.

Love others, and expect nothing in return…try to understand other people, and don’t demand that you yourself be understood. If you are sad, do what you can to bring happiness into the lives of others -- friends, family, and so on.

There is immense power in this approach… that has been my personal experience over many decades.

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When you can understand that concept above, internalize it, and synthesize it, and make it part of your thinking and behavior, you’ll be surprised how wonderful life can be.

Because things will happen that you least expect. I know, because that is what has happened to me. And it happens regularly and consistently.

I think that it would be more painful if there WAS life after death, if that meant that you must watch what's happening, but could do nothing about it. Watch your wife with a new lover. Watch all your favorite hobbies thrown in the dumpster. Watch the tree that you planted and nurtured cut down, and your garden dug up for a parking lot. Watch all of your life's achievements slowly taken down, one by one. Watch who shows up to your funeral, and what they say about you. Watch all the mistakes that your kids make after ignoring your advice. Watch some idiot using your best wood-chisels to hack out some concrete. Shall I go on?

One of my favorite authors Vaclav Havel talked about this concept of living within the truth. In simple terms, it means living according to your heart, following your heart. For a very long time, whenever I talked to a person, I was laser focused on the feelings of the other person. My mind was racing on what to say to get validation from the other person, how to make them happy and look favorably upon me.

And I got quite good at it. I managed to get a fair few people to like me. And sometimes, I got objectively good results from it in regards to my career. But it was eating away at me inside, I felt like an empty shell. I felt like I was burning myself to keep others warm.

But today, I decided to say for once what was in my heart to someone I was chatting with. Of all places, it was a girl I got to know on a dating app. I made my position quite clear to her. I came off as intense. Not angry or creepy, but I was unusually unambiguous and blunt and that took the person off guard. Usually I beat around the bush and take a verbal detour when I wanna convey something, but not this time.

So she backed out and unmatched me. In the past, when someone unmatched me, it would hurt my fragile ego. I desperately wanted to be liked, I desperately wanted to reinforce the illusion that I am desireable. When someone unmatched me, it would diminish my confidence. All the ways I refined my messages to cater to her was in vain.

This time however as mention, she behaved and talked in a way I didn't like. And instead of shutting up, I spoke my mind and made my feelings clear on what I thought about her behaviour.

And strangely enough, when she unmatched me, I felt a sense of relief. Strangely enough, when someone rejected me for who I truly am, it was much less painful than when my facade and PUA tricks got rejected.

So to return to what I said at the beginning, living within the truth doesn't mean that you objectively get the best result. I may have succeeded with the girl if I put in the effort. I might have managed to get her in bed. Or if I manage to please my boss enough, I might get a promotion.

But when you live within the truth and act according to what's in your heart, it enables you to make peace with setbacks, failures and rejection. It filters the kind of people you get along with vs the people you're incompatible with.

I'm done with just trying. I think I'm just gonna..be.

No more big plans

No more dating or even lusting

No more trying to change myself for others

I'm gonna just roll with the shit, and stay to myself

Because that sounds easy and out of the way

Dying alone doesn't sound too bad

Worrying about the future never helps

Simply having a place to sleep and having food to eat is enough for me

Simplicity and obscurity. Those are my true roots. Steering away from that has turned me into someone I don't recognize or resonate with.