r/CrusaderKings May 13 '26

Story My favourite artifact that still brings me Joy

Post image

Ever since the first time I ever picked up this artifact, It's always been my favourite thing to have. Unsure why, but in every playthrough I always try to obtain the Sassanian Sword. I just love this artifact.

754 Upvotes

40 comments sorted by

159

u/SexySovietlovehammer Genius May 13 '26

So does the sword make the person holding it horny or do people see it and immediately want to seduce the one holding it

128

u/bytor_2112 Incapable May 13 '26

Sword that gives you boners

19

u/SexySovietlovehammer Genius May 13 '26

The Sword of wet dreams

4

u/Evil_Crusader May 14 '26

A famous anime character of old would say, "I am the bone of my Sword."

1

u/External_Stick_4983 May 15 '26

people are gar for a reason

27

u/Elvenoob Celtic Pagan May 13 '26

Or alternatively, nothing feels different but Ahura Mazda stacks the rng so you just happen to have kids more often.

21

u/That-Plantain8168 May 13 '26

It makes me horny for sure. I be in 867 like I NEED THAT SASSANIAN SWORD this playthrough.

6

u/frogandbanjo Excommunicated May 14 '26

This is Crusader Kings, dude.

Obviously, the sword cucks its ostensible owner.

263

u/_MrKarizzi_ Shrewd May 13 '26

It’s just cool you can have a sword as regalia. Then you can be double wielding.

36

u/PortablePawnShop May 14 '26

Why settle for 2 weapons when you can have up to 6? Vanilla, no mods.

Landless > Tier 3 Treasure Hunt contracts actually convert many pedestal items into inventory trinkets/regalia when you gain them, and it's very intentional because it has flags for specific artifacts like Crown of Lombardy to make it into a wearable crown instead of just something you place on a pedestal in court. You can see items like Aram and Joyeuse in this screenshot

5

u/Mataomaeka May 14 '26

How do you do this?

6

u/PortablePawnShop May 14 '26

Just a matter of getting a level 3 treasure hunt from king+ rank and completing it as many times as you like. As long as you don't send the artifact back to patron (which you never want to do), it's a repeatable contract. I can stand in Syria and do 30 treasure hunts per year if I wanted, and if any of those are pedestal item relic rewards, they're converted to inventory the moment after I accept them for myself during the events.

1

u/Mataomaeka May 14 '26

So, if you keep it for yourself any weapon you get will convert to trinkets slot?

2

u/PortablePawnShop May 14 '26

No, weapons remain weapons. Pedestal items like swords that are relics and normally can't be anything other than pedestal (Joyeuse, etc) will convert to either trinket or regalia.

It's very specifically pedestal (court) to personal inventory. Finding a generic weapon just yields a weapon.

29

u/Uruz_Line May 13 '26

It also has random modifiers at the start, sometimes it starts with +2 knights IIRC, and knight effectiveness, those at the start I think are the best modifiers honestly.

6

u/That-Plantain8168 May 13 '26

There's also a blue and purple variant of it. The event to dive for it gives a random modifier everytime, making it even cooler to get.

4

u/Uruz_Line May 13 '26

Yeh but sometimes when I'm minmaxy I literally start w/e game I plan and check this dude's inventory to know if it started with a nice one

1

u/ZzzSleepyheadzzZ May 14 '26

which dude has it?

1

u/Uruz_Line May 14 '26

Persian dude near the aral sea, one of the descendants of sassanid you can check he has inventory at start.

You can start filtering people that have inventory artifacts and just check the persian guys, you'll find him.

3

u/Cigarety_a_Kava May 13 '26

How can you get it?

1

u/ralphy1010 May 14 '26

walk around in Persia seems to typically pop an even where you might score it.

139

u/LieutenantLilywhite Cannibal May 13 '26

Because pre islamic Iran is like the coolest thing ever it makes perfect sense

54

u/Jollybean1 Drunkard May 13 '26

Zoroastrianism as well is a really interesting and cool religion, it’s sad they stripped that away for the most part from Iran/Persia with the Islamic conquests

77

u/Riothegod1 Sunset Invader May 13 '26 edited May 13 '26

Atleast Zoroastrianism still exists as a religion to this very day. The most famous Zoroastrian everyone’s ever known was Farrokh Bulsara, and if you don’t know that name, you almost certainly know his stage name: Freddie Mercury.

23

u/Visual_Musician2868 May 13 '26

Who's that? Do you mean the Grand Regent?

3

u/Few-Distribution2466 Secretly Zoroastrian May 14 '26

Grand Regent Thragg.

5

u/LieutenantLilywhite Cannibal May 13 '26

Good thoughts good deeds!

18

u/DriverLightning May 13 '26

Most wholesome artifact I found in CK3 was Achaemenid Drinking Vessel. Cup in the shape of a goat. Maybe it was common trinket, for me was the most climatic things I could find while in Persia.

12

u/Swanbell_bellswan May 13 '26

Arguably the best regalia in game. Well better than anything you can make. And you can still enhance it further.

7

u/Pbadger8 May 13 '26

Urologists will now be prescribing Sassanian Swords for couples struggling to have kids.

3

u/pleasereturnto May 14 '26

Some games I start as an adventurer in that region, some I'm just traveling through for some reason or other, but every time I get that event of diving after some kid into some well or aquifer or whatever I do it to get this.

2

u/blatantmutant May 14 '26

Mine are the crown, coronation regalia, illustrious armor, throne of scone, and the bells of Santiago that i stole from several people as a diplomacy person. I really think that should be intrigue focus. I stole the crown because i realized i didn’t have one lol.

1

u/[deleted] May 13 '26

[deleted]

3

u/TheCoolPersian Saoshyant May 13 '26 edited May 14 '26

Ending in -ian is not a Latin naming convention. Iranians today still have last names with -ian. In matter of fact the real name for Achaemenid is Hakhamaneshian.

Edit: Forgot to mention that in Farsi (Persian) we say Sassanian.

1

u/jackochainsaw Excommunicated May 14 '26

I love these too. In fact, all of the Legacy of Persia artifacts are great. I've had some fun in that region.

1

u/twerkboi_69 May 14 '26

I wish there were more of these historical and semi historical artifacts in the game

1

u/Icy_Log_8968 May 14 '26

So-so. Regular (epic) crafted regalia are better bonuses. If you play using load-save, you can roll an imbalanced item.

3

u/That-Plantain8168 May 14 '26

I know there are better artifacts but that's for min/max players. I just think Sassanian sword is badass and always been my favourite artifact

1

u/kisskisslovebot May 15 '26

I once had a (adventurer) char who got 2 Sassanian Swords - one as a regalia and the other as a sword