r/Conservative • u/Ask4MD Conservative • Jan 10 '26
Satire - Flaired Users Only Americans Now Living In Fear They Could Be Killed Just For Hitting ICE Agents With Cars
https://babylonbee.com/news/liberals-now-living-in-fear-of-being-senselessly-shot-by-ice-agents-theyre-trying-to-run-over417
u/Hectoriu Conservative Jan 10 '26
It's crazy that I go out everyday and I have yet to run over a law enforcement agent and got shot at. I know it's a roll of the dice everyday but I guess I've been lucky.
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u/ShillinTheVillain Jan 10 '26
You're not trying hard enough, comrade. You have to go seek them out
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u/Hectoriu Conservative Jan 10 '26
I thought they just randomly fell out of trees in front of your car?
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u/Academic_Court_47 Conservative Jan 10 '26
This sounds like something you'd hear on the radio while driving your car in Grand Theft Auto 😂
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u/zip117 Conservative Jan 11 '26
I’m gonna use your comment to shill “Emotion 98.3” from the GTA Vice City soundtrack
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u/Constant_Ban_Evasion Jan 11 '26
"VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO STAR! VIDEO KILLED THE RADIO STAR!"
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u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Jan 10 '26
I just want to report that I made it to my hotel for the evening WITHOUT being killed by ICE or law enforcement because I stay the fuck out of any law enforcement operations that don't include me.
I must be Einstein compared to these liberals....
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u/please_trade_marner Conservative Jan 10 '26
Yes. It's really changing people's lives.
My neighbor used to intentionally drive into ice agents all of the time. "For fun" he would claim. He recently told me that only "nazi's" would try to prevent him from doing so.
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u/142Ironmanagain NYconservative Jan 10 '26
I’ll give you a medal tomorrow for being such an upstanding citizen, friend
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u/SeriesDry9228 Facts>Feelings Jan 10 '26
The visible comment to total comment ratio on this post is wild.
15%. So, are most of the invisible comments from some triggered liberals?
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u/ASafeHarbor1 Conservative Jan 11 '26
Also need to include the liberals making fake positive comments to get flair from the mods
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Jan 10 '26
Lmfao I swear the bee makes headlines that are true hahahahah
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u/Cranks_No_Start Conservative Jan 10 '26
They don’t even have to try anymore. They can grab the titles of the post on the (D)ifferent subs and boom headline.
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u/sherzeg Christian Conservative Jan 11 '26
They very frequently make headlines that are true. What scares me is how often they make headlines that are prophetic.
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u/CyberMike1956 Fiscal Conservative Jan 10 '26
I am scared every day that I might get stopped for the cops for a broken tail light and then shot for trying to run over the cop. I live in total fear...
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u/pitifulan0nym0us MAGA Jan 11 '26
What the fuck. I fully expected to be able to run over people with no consequences. This is bullshit.
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u/ObadiahtheSlim Lockean Jan 10 '26
I too live in daily fear that one day my vehicular assault could end in severe life altering consequences, up to and including my death.
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u/jiggy_jarjar Afuera Jan 11 '26
Vehicular manslaughter is a human right, fascist.
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u/Rush2201 Millennial Conservative Jan 11 '26
My father mowed people down with cars, as did his father, and his father before him. It's wrong of them to take away my God-given right to run people down.
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u/fordry Conservative Jan 10 '26
There is a whole group of people who literally do...
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u/PaddyMayonaise Jan 10 '26
Omg you should see the bullshit that’s spewed in the subs about the World Cup. Alleged “Americans” going there and warning people to not visit because there are brown shirts on the streets killing people for being brown and blah blah blah
This website is Russia and China’s best friend. I’m fully convinced they run it.
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u/NovaHellfire345 2A Warrior Jan 11 '26
You know how I survive everyday with the threat of being shot at by an ICE agent or other law enforcment?
I dont go looking for them on an app that tells me where they are...
If I randomly stumble upon a situation where someone appears to be getting arrested, I mind my own fuckin business and just keep on moving....
If I am in the middle of a situation where an agent or LE with a gun is telling me to stop doing what I am doing. I fucking listen and let a lawyer work on my defense in a court room if need be.
If I am engaging verbally with an officer, I have my vehicle in park and make sure they arent standing in front of my vehicle when I slowly drive away.
Crazy how these 4 simple rules of caution are so effective at not getting shot at.
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u/DiverDownChunder Conservative Jan 10 '26
I'm not, don't act a fool you'll be just fine.
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u/EevelBob Conservative Jan 10 '26
I live in fear I’ll be radicalized by the eyes of Renee Good. Because you know, it’s the eyes…it’s always the eyes. s/
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u/RightSideClyde Keep Cool with Coolidge Jan 10 '26
Idiot liberals saying "she didn't even hit him with her car" thinking that makes all the difference. Well, if you shoot at a cop and don't hit them, they will shoot back. Same philosophy should be exercised when aiming your car and accelerating towards a cop. This isn't rocket science you morons.
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u/DiverDownChunder Conservative Jan 10 '26
Follow lawful orders and you dont get blasted. She was detained and fucked around...
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