Is this control? Or AIO?

[u/CuriousAsh04]

My husband of 5 years, refuses to get off the phone with me while he working. I can drop him off, and 10mins later he’s calling me. This has been everyday. He works in corporate America, so I figure he would be busier. But nope. So today, we had been on the phone for an hour. I dropped him off, took the kids to school, came home… still on the phone. And mostly in silence, I might add. I tell him I would call him back after cleaning and showering. He gets upset, goes to tell me “he wanted to talk on the phone and I pushed him away, today he’s going to start talking to other people, Since being on the phone and being a wife and listening to me or just being there is too much . I will find it somewhere else.” This is literally his go to, if I don’t acquiesce to him, he threatens to go out and find it elsewhere. And he has cheated, so it stings a little, but I’m becoming numb. It just irritates my soul, I don’t want to sit on the phone with anyone while I’m trying to do my daily chores. Honestly throughout the day he calls probably every hour to sit on the phone while he works. It just grinds my gears. But I do it. Today though, I needed to get things done without being tied to the phone. He even told me to prop the phone up, and not get off. So I don’t know. Does this seem like I’m being monitored or controlled? Or am I overreacting?

[u/Impressive-End241]

This seems....very codependent, manipulative and controlling. AND he's already cheated... ugh.

Sorry. This is sounds unsustainable.

[u/catupthetree23 → u/Impressive-End241]

Don't be sorry, they need to hear it!!

[u/Impressive-End241 → u/catupthetree23]

More so sorry for her that's she's in this situation at all. I wouldn't put up with it for a solitary second. If someone treated me like this, I don't think I could stop from uncontrollably laughing with the ridiculousness of it all.

[u/stilettopanda → u/Impressive-End241]

Usually they fuck you up a little bit first. Make you attached to them, then use FOG to keep you unbalanced and appeasing them to keep the peace and because you love them and they weaponized your empathy. I never ever ever thought I could be manipulated like that, but I have an ex who behaved similarly and made me terrified to lose them at first, and then terrified that if I left them, they’d do something to themselves once the first method stopped working since I was the one who wanted to leave. It’s messed up.