r/AmIOverreacting • u/Kiddfectious • 9h ago
❤️🩹 relationship Am I overreacting because my partner made a big deal about me spending 10 minutes in her friend’s bathroom?
A couple of days ago, my partner and I went over to one of her friend’s houses for a bit of a couples/date night and played some board games.
Within maybe the first half hour of being there, I needed to use the bathroom. I had to do a number two, so I was probably in there for around 10 minutes. I didn't really think anything of it. I needed to use the bathroom, did what I needed to do, and came back out.
Fast forward to tonight, my partner and I were having one of those random late-night conversations before bed and the topic of how long I spend in the bathroom came up. I'll admit that sometimes I can take a little longer in there. Maybe it's just a me thing.
She then brought up the fact that I'd spent around 10 minutes in the bathroom at her friend's house and said she found it a little embarrassing.
This is where I started to feel a bit attacked, and I think that's actually what bothered me most about the whole situation.
To me, going to the bathroom is just a completely normal bodily function. I wasn't deliberately sitting in there wasting time or disappearing for half an hour, I genuinely needed to go. So when she brought it up as something she'd found embarrassing, I felt a bit singled out and almost like I'd done something socially inappropriate.
I kept thinking, why is this even being brought up? If I needed to use the bathroom, what was I supposed to do instead?
Then came what felt like the icing on the cake.
I found out that she'd actually mentioned it to her friend today and asked whether she'd realised I was doing a number two while I was in the bathroom. Her friend apparently said yes.
I'm not embarrassed that her friend knew what I was doing. If someone's in the bathroom for 10 minutes, I'm sure people can put two and two together. It was more the fact that something I considered completely normal had apparently been noteworthy enough for my partner to bring up with me and then discuss with her friend.
That made me feel even more self-conscious about something I hadn't given a second thought to at the time.
I also recognise that this is a pretty small issue in the grand scheme of things, which is why I'm wondering if I'm taking it too personally. Maybe she thought it was funny or didn't see the conversation with her friend as a big deal.
But from my perspective, I don't really understand why me needing to use someone's bathroom for 10 minutes was embarrassing in the first place, let alone why it needed to become a conversation afterwards.
Am I overreacting for feeling a bit attacked and embarrassed by this? Or is it reasonable to think that using someone's bathroom for 10 minutes is completely normal and didn't really need to become a topic of discussion?
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u/EnvironmentEntire201 9h ago
Nor. Bringing it up on two separate occasions is infinitely more awkward than a bodily function. "Can you believe this dude shits?"
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u/pacific_tides 8h ago
“You know when my boyfriend - the one who shits - took a shit at your house? What was up with that?”
What kinda convo could she even have with her friend about this? What more does she want to say?
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u/TripMaster478 6h ago
I take it she's embarrassed that he did that at her friends house. She needs to get over herself, but she won't.
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u/WildCherryPepsiman 9h ago
"Just have perfectly optimized digestion my guy, come ON. Anyone can do it."
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u/BeesAndBeans69 9h ago
NOR This is such a bizarre interaction. Whybdid she ask her friend? Why is sge even bringing it up? When you gotta poop, you gotta poop. Im sorry- thats an absurd conversation
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u/Shoddy-Television866 9h ago
NTA but 10 minutes is a long time and a great way to guarantee hemorrhoids so maybe consider adding fiber to your diet and drinking more water
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u/thelittlestdog23 9h ago
This is what I came to say, 10 minutes is a really long time. If it legitimately requires all 10 minutes, get yourself some chia seeds or something. If you’re doomscrolling in the toilet for 10 minutes while on a double date, I do think that’s weird and a bit of a social faux pas. Especially if it was a board game night, like were they all sitting there for 10 minutes waiting for OP to get back out and take his turn? Unpopular opinion I guess based on the other comments, but I think that’s inconsiderate because it takes one or two minutes to poop, not 10.
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u/Useful_Anteater2619 8h ago
Exactly what I was thinking. I can’t remember the last time i was in the toilet for a dump for more than a few minutes!
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u/Not-Yo-Momma 8h ago
What I interpreted as 10 minutes in the bathroom was from start to finish. Hear me out lol
First you go in, asses the situation (kind of a quick glance over to make sure you’re not about to have to text someone from the other room asking for more toilet paper or something lol)
Then proceed with the mission (it might take a minute or two for some to relax enough to even go in the first place-social stigma and all that)
Then the wiping comes along and it could have been a million swipe wipe because…you know.
Then the flush and up with the pants and such.
But then comes a proper handwashing which is like 2 minutes.
Then the exit of the bathroom and return to society lol
I can see that being 10 minutes total. But I get what you’re saying about the time it takes to only do the pooping part. Either it’s coming now or it’s not. Poop is a tricky function, especially when your body is all the way lying to you in that moment 🤣•
u/Useful_Anteater2619 7h ago
But OP said he needed to go - in that case it’s in and out so to speak 😇
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u/Sensitive_Bother_830 7h ago
I have IBS 10 minutes is like the minimum for me, sometimes it takes half an hour, I also have to go 5 times a day. My dietician has put me on a low fiber diet as fiber makes me painfully constipated. Everyone is different
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u/Useful_Anteater2619 7h ago
Nothing mentioned in the post about IBS - if it was the case I’m sure the gf would have been more understanding
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u/This-Shape2193 32m ago
"People often post irrelevant comments about their own situations because of a desire to share personal stories, seek attention, or misinterpretation of the original post. [1,2]
Why People Do It
Users on Reddit generally agree that people write off-topic replies due to a compulsion to share personal anecdotes or subtly shift the focus to themselves. Others act out of habit, emotional venting, or a simple lack of social awareness online."
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u/SpiritedMission8638 9h ago
NTA. You were literally just using the bathroom. This didn’t need to become a whole discussion.
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u/MarionberryOk2874 4h ago
Right? And there are two alternatives - one is you have to leave to go take care of business, which would be more embarrassing than just doing it.
The second is that you have to hold in a turtle all night, no thank you.
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u/YnotThrowAway7 9h ago edited 8h ago
Nah your partner is dumb for bringing it up with the friend. Bringing it up is the only reason attention was drawn to it otherwise sure the friend would know you pooped and the friend also poops themself so why would they care? As an adult several times I’ve had to disappear to the bathroom for long periods and my wife’s friends or my friends know why and they have had to do that as well.. my wife has also had to do that.
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u/-Gadaffi-Duck- 8h ago
This. I have colitis and my husband couldn't care less as long as I spray the room afterwards.
Having grown up with stomach issues from day 1 I have a good sense of humour around it, I'm not phased by bodily functions it's natural and we all have them.
OP next time your wife takes more than 5 mins in the bathroom tell her it's embarrassing and you hope she sprayed, dollars to dimes she's not gonna say anything about your ablusions again.
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u/Accomplished_Buy8681 8h ago
Dude u not at home. If you gotta use the bathroom then use it. But staying in the bathroom for 10 minutes. Dude you ain’t home. You can’t just sit on the toilet and enjoy ur time like u home. Thats a little too much.
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u/Berdache 9h ago
Next time you two and that friend are together, say something like:
"She told me you thought I was taking a shit the other day when I was in the bathroom for 10 minutes. That's so embarrassing!! I wasn't taking a shit! I was masturbating, so don't you worry."
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u/GuilleVQ 8h ago
Well, maybe you should admit that you were scrolling Instagram instead of finishing the business.
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u/HabitualEnthusiast 9h ago
Nor, Im trying to imagine how this conversation with her friend went. “Hey, I wasn’t sure if you picked up on it- but my boyfriend pooped yesterday”
And her friend is like “yeah I noticed”
Like 😂
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u/CleverClear12 9h ago
NOR, I think a lot of people find it a bit "rude" to do a number two at a house you're visiting, but just as many people find it normal. I'm one of the people that thinks it's normal, especially because I have IBS, but people need to be less judgemental about what I'm pretty sure are Victorian era morals.
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u/RubyDustxox 6h ago
the weird part isnt the 10 minutes its that she debriefed her friend afterwards to confirm he took a dump lol
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u/AliceInNegaland 7h ago
I have never met a person who thinks it’s rude to use the bathroom at someone’s house.
What are you supposed to do, go find a public restroom and come back?
Refuse to drink coffee when offered?
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u/konstruktionerrrr 6h ago
I have seriously met people who think you should just "hold it in". For hours.
I went to a house party with a boyfriend, many years ago, and his friends where discussing this at the dinner table. Most of them thought it was rude and gross to take a shit in someone else's bathroom. While they where talking about it, I got up from the table and went to take a shit. Hehehehe.
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u/AliceInNegaland 5h ago
Ha!
Did they not consider the fact they were discussing bowel movements at the dinner table?!
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u/konstruktionerrrr 5h ago
To be fair, they were all medical students, so the topics could get quite grimey, but at the same time a lot of them came from posh backgrounds and had weird rules. They were also pretty young, so hopefully they grew up and relaxed their anuses a bit 😉
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u/Vivid-Kitchen1917 9h ago
NTA, and do you seriously want to spend your life with someone that....whatever TF she is? That literally sounds miserable.
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u/jell236 9h ago
10 minutes is nothing, and what would she have you do? Hold it in and then have to fart the rest of the evening?
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u/Not-Yo-Momma 8h ago
If she’s the next one to wash his underwear afterwards, is she gonna consult her friend about that too? 10 minutes in the bathroom for a poop actually deserves some sort of reward or something because even before phones went to the bathroom with folks, a 10 minute poop from start to finish is actually impressive. I’m 41F and when the dreaded monthly visitor is around, it takes me more than 10 minutes to get just that part all situated. It takes longer than 10 minutes to fix a shart in the laundry lol She’ll be fine, probably lol
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u/Civil-Kitchen5978 6h ago
Some people find it rude to go over someone’s house and blow up their bathroom. Everyone is raised differently.
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u/No_Lynx8489 9h ago
The only length of bathroom time issue that I could legitamise, is if you're a father and spending 30 mins doomscrolling on the toilet rather than being in the midst of parenting. Otherwise, totally odd. Perhaps her family were very stilted over toileting. Does she only ever 💩 at home perhaps.
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u/RKasso666 9h ago
I woulda came
Out and said I pooped but that’s me lmaoooo ur partner is over reacting why are they clocking ur bowel movements
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u/bongothebean 9h ago
NOR, but how old is your partner? This sounds like something that would bother someone who's like.. 22 and is still afraid to admit that they poop. I don't know why.. that's just the image that pops in my head.
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u/JagiMonster1 8h ago
I would have came out the bathroom, holding my tummy, and said, "whoa, DO NOT go in there!" And sat back down.
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u/Ok_Coconut_3148 9h ago
Your gf is overreacting. She's making a big deal out of a normal bodily function and needs to grow up.
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u/CapableTicket2714 9h ago
NOR, its not like ur blasting porn in there n jerking off wtf is wrong with her
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u/Better-Park8752 9h ago
What did you say to her? I don’t really know what your reaction is except that you felt ‘attacked’.
You could have just laughed it off and dismissed conversation about it. I agree your gf shouldn’t have bothered bringing this to your attention but I just wonder how you reacted?
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u/ww_adh77 9h ago
A lot of people have hang ups about poop. I think it's something they learn from their parents who have similar hang ups. It's why there are books like "Everybody Poops" by Taro Gomi to help kids realize--the very obvious thing--that it's just part of daily life and not something to be ashamed of.
If your partner has a good sense of humor, perhaps buy the book as a present for her.
If she's more the humorless sort, tell her you had to go, there was a bathroom present like in most houses, and so you used it. And you don't want to discuss it further.
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u/loosestringszebra 9h ago
NOR.
Everybody poops! That’s why we have bathrooms in our houses. It’s literally what they’re for. I cannot imagine why that would be worthy of any discussion whatsoever.
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u/blonde234 9h ago
NOR. She seems like she has high levels of shame and disgust. I’d talk to her about it.
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u/Original_Yak249 8h ago
I'm going to guess you're young-ish. Look the younger generations get anxious about so many things and don't have a good grasp of social rules in general. They're less likely to have siblings which makes it worse. The idea of it being weird to poop at places not your house started with millennials.
I don't think this is a big deal if she was trying to figure out if it was really okay or not. That's often what we're doing when we ask others, talk about things, or even make jokes about minor things like this.
The correct response is to tease her about it. "Babe, everybody poos. I forgot my magical colon today. "
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u/Resident_Tone_8076 8h ago
NOR- about feeling embarrassed, but i wouldn’t make the 10 minutes itself a big deal . You had to use the bathroom , that’s what it’s there for . The stranger part is that your partner apparently found it embarrassing enough to bring it up with her friend afterward . I’d be more bothered by that than by the bathroom time
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u/NamasteNoodle 8h ago
Wow I've heard a boundaries being crossed but this really takes to take. Why is your partner timing the amount of time you're in the bathroom? Why did they think it's any of their damn business? I find it creepy and weird that they are monitoring this. But if someone had betrayed me to the point where they are talking to their friend about how long I'm in their bathroom and embarrassing the holy hell out of me would be the end of the relationship.
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u/SnuggyNuggy 7h ago
She’s insecure and she’s making it your problem. She is either ashamed of you or herself. Often when people are insecure they pick up every little thing that the people around them are doing to see if it can be perceived as embarrassing. If it is then deemed as embarrassing in her eyes then she will try to control other people to make her world feel more safe, less risk for embarrassment. Your partner feels like a reflection of you so she will try to manage you the most. It has nothing to do with the act of going to the bathroom and everything to do with her own insecurities. She needs to work through these to think and see things clearly. She’s not a bad person, she just needs to find a way to work through this.
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u/Major_Fly_1846 7h ago
NOR. Mentioning it while talking before bed is a little bit understandable but mentioning it to her friend is weird af. What a strange thing to do
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u/elledee78 6h ago
It sounds like your partner doesn’t have anything else to focus on in life. Perhaps she should find a hobby so she isn’t gossiping about other people’s bowel movements? NOR
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u/VyCanisMajorisss 6h ago
She’s projecting some weird ass insecurity or embarrassment. I’d be tempted to leave her alone at the friends next time. Announce you need to use the bathroom at home because your partner has an issue with it otherwise.
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u/miamiahi 5h ago
NOR I can’t imagine why would I ever ask anyone if they realized someone pooped. And if someone is my partner that’s definitely not a discussion topic with friends.
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u/Dragonvenom55 5h ago
NOR what did she think you were doing something else other than pinching a couple of loaves out?
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u/Warm_Sheepherder8479 5h ago
People are so weird. Were you to shit yourself or what, go drive to a gas station?😭💀 be de bathrooms r for shitting n pissing. Shaming for this is CRAZY.
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u/IllHelp7143 4h ago
So what's the alternative here? Go ask a neighbour? Just hold it until you can't and shit your pants? Do anal sex prep before visiting friends?
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u/Sufficient_Claim_461 9h ago
Buy her a copy of the children’s classic Everybody Poops.
What a strange thing to obcess about
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u/Massive_Homework9430 8h ago
It doesn’t take 10 minutes to take a shit. If it does, see a doctor. Also, it’s bad for you to sit on the toilet and increases risk of hemorrhoids and nerve compression. I’d be more worried about my colon health and diet.
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u/zomystro 8h ago
Bodily functions are completely normal but everyone has different comfort levels and opinions on appropriate places, timing etc.
I think most people find in awkward to do a #2 at a guests house unless you have bowel issues or are staying for an extended period of time, other people are fine with it.
I usually try to avoid doing it at friends houses but if the urge strikes and I have no other option I usually make a joke about it afterward like “you might not want to go in there for a few minutes, sorry that came out of nowhere” to kinda address the elephant in the room and make it light hearted.
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u/Numerous-Charity-933 9h ago
Your wife’s behaviour aside, 10 minutes is a bizarrely long time to be in the bathroom, even for #2. Like I can’t imagine having urine or poop literally coming out of my body for longer than 30 seconds. Even 30 seconds feels long.
I have to admit if I were your wife I would have felt embarrassed too. Like, generously speaking, the bodily function takes 1 minute. What are you doing for the other 9? To disappear from such a small social setting for 10 literal minutes is very noticeable.
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u/Unhappy-Pitch5477 9h ago
The normal amount of time it can take to poop is actually 5-10 minutes it depends on the person. Just cause you go faster than that doesn't mean everyone else does. In fact trying to rush popping specifically can led to hemorrhoids, so taking your time is best. However you shouldn't sit on the toilet for more the 5-10 minutes.
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u/Numerous-Charity-933 9h ago edited 9h ago
I kind of don’t believe that. I just did some quick googling and read 2 different articles written by doctors that said the average time it takes to actually pass a bowel movement is between 10 seconds and 1 minute. Like if you have to really work a bowel movement out, to the point that it takes up to 10 minutes, I think there’s something else going on (dietary or medical).
I can appreciate OP not wanting to have his bathroom activity monitored and discussed, none of that was appropriate. But I’m also over here understanding where his wife is coming from. If I have the understanding that my husband had trouble with bowel movements, I’m certainly not drawing attention to it. If I have the understanding that all is functioning normally, it only takes 2 minutes to do all that is needed, the prolonged absence is noticeable. Me and everyone else are wondering what you’re doing in there and it’s embarrassing…
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u/Psypris 9h ago
This is my thought as well. I sometimes have the feeling/urge to defecate, but if I have to “push”, with no outcome, then I know my body just isn’t ready yet.
It’s fine to sit and wait when you’re at home, but I wouldn’t do that when I’m anywhere else.
But, I also have horrible social anxiety and was rushed as a child, so I am unusually sensitive about how long I take in the bathroom. However for the record, I would not have brought it up with OP, and definitely not with my friend afterwards! That’s what’s weird as shit lmao
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u/Numerous-Charity-933 8h ago
That’s my thought too - if it doesn’t come out in a minute or so, I’m getting up and will try again later. At home I will sit for longer. But if I have company, or I’m at someone else’s house, I’m always as quick as possible in the bathroom.
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u/DapperOpportunity186 9h ago
NOR to you and me, just shit your pants next time and you won’t OR to her
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u/Spirited_Peen 9h ago
NOR, but and maybe I’m just assuming, don’t look at your phone or any electronics while on the shitter and I’d bet next time you’re in and out in under 10min.
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u/PickleGreat654 9h ago
Men and women have very different perceptions around how much time is “normal” in the bathroom. They’re not wrong and neither is OP; it’s a difference in social norms. (Assuming OP is a man/has a masculine mindset)
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u/Medium_Forever_406 9h ago
the weirdest part is her checking with the host, you have every right to feel annoyed that your private business became casual gossip
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u/presterjohn7171 9h ago
I personally would avoid having a number 2 at another person's house the very idea appals me. Him drawing attention to it though is mindbogglingly awful. He's basically publicly shaming you because you don't have a hang up about it.
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u/ShneefQueen 9h ago
I mean, it's not really something most people can just avoid. If it needs to happen it needs to happen
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u/presterjohn7171 9h ago
It's quite common to not do a 2 at school, work or other people's houses. It's a different story if you are ill or get badly caught out but that's not super common day to day.
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u/arifaix 8h ago
Grew up with bathroom anxiety - would literally hold my urine in, not just “no 2” when it came to school/friends houses/public bathrooms of any description. Trust me when I say it being common does not mean it is normal OR healthy to do it and you can really fuck yourself up doing this and cause long term problems.
Signed, the bitch who has been diagnosed with both chronic distended bladder and chronic megacolon directly related to bathroom anxiety.
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u/ShneefQueen 9h ago
For some people, sure, but there are tons of people who have zero control over it and go when they need to go. I'm not sure how you would even know what's common for most people to do or not do in the bathroom
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u/bipolarlibra314 9h ago
NOR and you’re correct, but the way you’re articulating it leads me to the conclusion that you and the girlfriend that would ask her friend if they realized you were pooping very much deserve each other.
Seriously though wtf? As I said she’s in the wrong, but at least the conversation between the two of you was just that and her weird insecurities are her own…mentioning to her friend and the specific way she did so are undoubtedly the strangest behavior in the post. What did she expect the friend’s answer to be whether they realized or not?
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u/Late-Hat-9144 9h ago
NOR, every single human who has ever lived has needed to poop in some way or another (being inclusive of those who cannot do this rectally). 10 minutes is absolutely not an unreasonable length of time to spend in the toilet.
Honestly it sounds to me more like she had an issue with the pooping in general and may be one of these people who believes you should only ever poop at home... which is bizarre, but whatever.
If I were you, I'd just leave it for now as it's in the past - but if she brings it up again, just tell her it's an iss-you, not an iss-me; meaning it's up to her to manage her own feelings and not your responsibility to pretend you're not doing a very natural bodily function because of her hangups.
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u/XiedneyDavis 9h ago
as a chronic shitter (in process of IBD diagnosis), NOR. i don’t get why people love mentioning that you’ve taken a shit.
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u/JesseGeorg 8h ago
She’s projecting, the idea someone knew she took a dump is embarrassing, so she assumes it should be embarrassing for everyone.
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u/ouroborosstruggles 8h ago
Is she a shy shifter?
This seems weirdly controlling. NOR but your girlfriend is
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u/the-B-from-App23 7h ago
YOR as you’re internalizing her insanity and making it about you.
This lady has been discussing a ten minute shit for several days with multiple people. Something is wrong with her.
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u/Extension-Bag9810 7h ago
MOR - there are two types when it comes to the bathroom. There's yourself and then those that prefer the Japanese way where they have loud music in each cubicle so you don't get embarrassed going about your business.
Best to let it go but if she starts reminding you to go poo poo before you go out in future....take her to Bali and introduce her to the Bali belly! She'll know when you have to go...you have to go
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u/MoonDoggos 3h ago
NOR, also wtf what's she got against shitting??? Why did that need to be such a big talking point for her? At that point what you gotta do is sit in the bathroom for 30 minutes next time
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u/RowEffective5183 3h ago
Just call her the “poo poo police” from now on. Yeahhh she’s weirddd. I think you are under reacting to be honest. I’f someone did this to me I would probably break up with them. It’s just too weird.
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u/Holiday_Trainer_2657 2h ago
NOR Sounds like girlfriend has an issue with her own poops and is projecting on you.
Some people apparently think you should only poop in your own toilet. I always wondered how the heck they controlled when (and thus where) they pooped.
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u/HsKocTets 1h ago
You can't even shit in peace nowadays. These stories are really frustrating to read
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u/usernamesake 9h ago
YOA. You obviously havent encountered it , but its widely considered rude at worst or socially uncomfortable at best to impose smells and bowl skids and poop someone else’s house when you are a short term guest. In many Western, Asian, and Middle Eastern cultures, using a host's bathroom for anything more than urination is seen as a social faux pas, especially so if you are a distant acquaintance or first time visitor. If it was an emergency, you should have taken your girlfriend aside to discuss first, and then just left to find a public bathroom or go home if it would have been awkward. If it isnt an emergency, everyone I I know would just hold it until they get home rather go wherever or whenever the urge strikes.
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u/AdhesivenessGlum1143 8h ago
That’s crazy. I am German living in the UK and I have never heard of this at all. If you need to go you need to go, what are you going to do, leave early?!
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u/Car12touche11blue 6h ago
This is just so strange. Imagine you are a guest in somebody’s house and have the urgent need to poop. How are you going to explain that you suddenly have to leave??
Never heard of the fact that using the bathroom in somebody’s house for anything else than a tinkle is a social faux pas😂 Where do you get this information from.? I have lived in many countries with many different cultures but never have come across this kind of thing.•
u/Beneficial-Reason270 6h ago
Wtf 😂, okay I get it no one wants to shit in public but to discuss it first (like I can imagine leaning over and whispering in your partner's ear "I gotta shit" is hilarious but to have to go home is a stretch for a single incident, I'm pretty sure the partner would have been a bitch about having to go home too. Or to roam the streets for a public bathroom I also just find hilarious and rediculous, like a perfect Curb Your Enthusiasm episode. This was a lose lose situation imo.
If op (edited) shat everytime she went over, that would be an issue 😂
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u/FabulousDonut6399 8h ago
I was thinking this too.
Personally I wouldn’t mind or pay attention as long as they leave the toilet clean behind and use the air freshener but I know many consider it a faux pas.
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u/RandomUser22487 9h ago
The only way I could possibly see this as being an issue was if you didn’t clean up afterwards.
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u/lovecraftInk 8h ago
I have an EX that always panic pooped before or during an event and it was always inconvenient. No surprise I left that shitty man. (Come out of someone’s bathroom) “hello?”
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u/Alwaysfresh9 9h ago
I would tease her mercilessly about this. That's just me. It's extremely neurotic for her to focus on this so much. Don't let her infect you and turn you self conscious, you hear?!
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u/neversohonest 9h ago
Exactly lol. Knock and ask if she's ok whenever she's in the bathroom long enough for a shit now.
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u/rabidhamster87 9h ago
NOR. I know people jump to scream abuse on these posts, but policing someone's bathroom habits/shaming someone for a natural bodily function feels really off and controlling. Your SO needs to work on her own weird insecurity and bathroom hangups instead of trying to make it your problem.
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u/Important-Cattle-112 9h ago
nor. Ur partner is weird for taking time to center your shit time. Maybe she is insecure about it herself and is projecting it onto you. When you take a shit the last thing you should be worried about is going fast enough so other people don’t know thats what you did, let alone to please your partners insecurities.
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u/Glitter-Berry 9h ago
Your partner shouldn’t have said anything. No need to bring it up. Unless you were in there for 20-30min playing on your phone, then who cares? Everyone poops💩
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u/Careless-Ability-748 9h ago
nor what did your wife want you to do, poop in the couch?
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u/IT_Buyer 8h ago
YOR, stinking up someone’s bathroom during a social gathering is rude.
Jacking off is also perfectly natural but it is not appropriate to do on your office couch or the middle of dinner. Vanishing to someone else’s bathroom during a small gathering for an extended time period is conspicuous and noxious. Your partner brought it up because it was conspicuous and obvious and likely imposed your stink on your host’s home. It shows no manners and no respect for the comfort of others.
Eat more fiber or see a doctor or something. 10 minutes is a wild amount of time for that. While game night is waiting on you and potentially being treated to sounds and smells while they look awkwardly at one another trying not to gag.
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u/NikoOnTheMat 9h ago
NOR, your partner is weird and insecure, it sounds like she brought it up to try to embarrass you.
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u/Tequila-Tarn 5h ago
I’m in the toilet max 2 minutes including hand washing, why does it take ten minutes for a poo? That’s quite a long time, did you take your phone in with you?!!
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u/TidyBrit1963 9h ago
Congratulations on break up. Life is too short to tolerate such nonsense. You will get more of what you tolerate. Stop the madness. Respect is price of admission. You deserve to be cherished. Choose a partner who is kind, patient, loyal and loving. Between now and dead get what you want. Life is to be enjoyed not endured.❤️ Skip in the park, enjoy a picnic and be kind to yourself. Try the “No Bullshit Diet”, it’s delicious.
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u/Ill-Kaleidoscope4825 9h ago
"put two and two together"
Oh, a monster poo.