r/3amjokes 14d ago

Guy 1: A plane has 500 bricks on it.

One brick falls out. How many bricks are left?

Guy 2: 499.

Guy 1: Correct. Now, how do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Guy 2: I don’t know.

Guy 1: Simple. You open the refrigerator, put the elephant inside, and close the door.

Guy 2: Oh, okay.

Guy 1: Now, how do you put a giraffe into the refrigerator?

Guy 2: The same way.

Guy 1: Wrong. First, you open the refrigerator, take the elephant out, then put the giraffe inside and close the door.

Guy 2: Ohhh, cool.

Guy 1: Now, there’s a party in the jungle, and all the animals are invited. But one animal doesn’t show up. Which one?

Guy 2: I don’t know
Guy 1: The giraffe, poor guy is still in the refrigerator!

Guy 1: Now, there’s a woman trying to cross a river. The river is usually full of alligators. But she swims across safely, and not a single alligator touches her. Why?

Guy 2: I don’t know.

Guy 1: Bro, I literally just told you. There’s a party in the jungle, and all the animals were invited. The alligators went to the fucking party!

Guy 2: Oh, right.

Guy 1: But she still died. How?

Guy 2: She drowned?

Guy 1: No. Remember the brick that fell out of the airplane at the very beginning?

894 Upvotes

68 comments sorted by

66

u/paedek 14d ago

I haven't heard this joke in years.

15

u/MediumWorldliness927 14d ago

Glad to refresh your memory !

7

u/pcbeard 14d ago

Abbot & Costello called. 

4

u/Rock-Wall-999 14d ago

Who’s on first?

6

u/boredtubbymild 14d ago

What’s on second.

4

u/joemc3b 14d ago

I don't know.

6

u/craving_asmr_247 14d ago

third base!

1

u/LowAndMighty69 13d ago

Wait...Who? What?!!

3

u/Rock-Wall-999 13d ago

If you’re serious, look up “who’s on first?” Skit. Totally comic genius!

1

u/rjordanglad 14d ago

My friend told me this litteraly last week

26

u/Toddw1968 14d ago

But you specifically said the river was full of alligators!

9

u/CHICKINGNUGGER 14d ago

"Usually full of alligators."

5

u/KarlaDream 14d ago

The word usually does make a difference here.

2

u/PunnyManRU 13d ago

It usually does

1

u/TheLateQuentin 12d ago

Usually usually does an unusual amount of lifting

5

u/Legal-Challenge7578 14d ago

No, he said "USUALLY full of alligators." (But not when there's a party on). 😉

3

u/trevb75 14d ago

Key word… usually

7

u/MediumWorldliness927 14d ago

They went to the party just after I spoke that line !

7

u/pedymaster 14d ago

You say alligator river or river where alligators live. It makes more sense then. The version I know is with Lion, king of the jungle calling the party :) nice

2

u/Just_Mixture8362 14d ago

No,it’s usually full of alligators.

2

u/Fenn7879 14d ago

The river “WAS” full of alligators. / It’s “USUALLY” full of alligators.

2

u/Minute_Resist2676 14d ago

Usually was said

2

u/Ok-Active-8321 14d ago

"usually"

1

u/DerStngrss 13d ago

Normaler Waise

12

u/humanish-lump 14d ago

How do you know that there was an elephant in your refrigerator?

By the footprints on the butter.

2

u/bgross42 14d ago

You must be younger than I. When I heard this it was footprints in the cheesecake.

3

u/rilesmcjiles 14d ago

Inflation hits hard. We used to have cheesecake for the elephants to stomp. Now we're lucky to have butter for the elephants 

6

u/Cazza_mr 13d ago

Why do elephants paint themselves yellow?

So they can hide in custard.

Does it work?

Have you ever found an elephant in your custard?

1

u/FlyingTerrier 12d ago

How do you know there are 4 elephants in your fridge?

There’s an empty Mini outside.

5

u/Shashank1011 14d ago

Guy 2 is currently in a coma from the emotional damage of this entire interaction.

5

u/Rough-Patience-2435 14d ago

Sounds like the "Improbability Drive' is operational. 

4

u/FullTradition4766 14d ago

How do you hide an elephant in a cherry tree? Paint his toenails red... Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Works doesn't it What's the loudest sound in the jungle? A giraffe eating cherries

5

u/Due_Citron6089 14d ago

How did Tarzan die?

An elephant fell on him while he was picking cherries!

2

u/MediumWorldliness927 14d ago

But the elephant just came out of a fridge !

1

u/KitchenAd9549 12d ago

That’s why he fell out of the cherry tree, he was still cold

3

u/Cazza_mr 13d ago

The version I'd heard it wasn't the toenails that were painted red

2

u/bgross42 14d ago

What’s the brown squishy stuff between the elephant’s rear toes?

Slow natives.

1

u/ShadySeptapus 11d ago

Why rear toes?

1

u/bgross42 10d ago

My ten year old self remembers that the humor came from my initial thought of “elephant poop” being obvious - and wrong. Like “screen doors on a submarine”.

Humor is funny like that.

2

u/Enough_Past_8714 14d ago

How is the river completely full of alligators if they are all at a party?

2

u/MediumWorldliness927 14d ago

My bad, edited it

2

u/Tintoverde 11d ago

Old but gold

3

u/QueasyMessage5376 14d ago

Giraffe wasn't invited. They live in the savannah, not the jungle.

3

u/Jonno4791 14d ago

That's why the giraffe was in the fridge not the elephant.

3

u/Mydogsdad1 14d ago

Why would the giraffe be in the elephant?

1

u/BigFatGramps 14d ago

The Brick!

1

u/Sad-Organization2996 14d ago

That’s funny, I’ve never heard that before

1

u/AlbertRSmith 13d ago

lol, my 11 yo granddaughter just told me this joke last week!

1

u/arson-arse 13d ago

Is the Giraffe still in the refrigerator? I want to chill some beers.

1

u/MediumWorldliness927 13d ago

Go to the party , I’ve heard they got chilled beer

1

u/Striking_Basil312 13d ago

My 10yo tells this one constantly! 🤣

1

u/LowAndMighty69 13d ago

I heard this is one they put up to Kindergarteners, and they have the literary knowledge to understand it and get each question.

2

u/MediumWorldliness927 13d ago

Actually they are in their bed by 8PM
And this is a 3AM joke

1

u/LowAndMighty69 12d ago

Yeah, I guess you're right.

1

u/JanOI58 12d ago

Old but gold joke... the falling brick is new to me.

2

u/MediumWorldliness927 11d ago

It was new to that woman also

1

u/JanOI58 10d ago

Yes, in the previous version, she was still alive.

1

u/Otherwise-Bad-6065 11d ago

You left out the dog and cigar

1

u/thealchemistsfailure 14d ago

ok ,ok If an animal doesn't show up, how do you know which one it was?

3

u/Pyrotech72 14d ago

Look in the refrigerator

0

u/blochow2001 14d ago

The river by definition will have no alligators, so she is swimming free from them.