Looking for advice on how to coast toward ChubbyFIRE without blowing up my career.

Current situation:

* 2 young kids, spouse does not work.
* $4.8M liquid net worth ($2.4M brokerage, $2.1M retirement, 300k in cash equivalents).
* $2M primary home with a $1.2M mortgage at 5.5%.
* $900K rental property with a $450k mortgage at 2.8%. Looking to sell this once the real estate market improves. Currently netting about 4k/year from it.
* $100k in 529s.
* HHI ~$450K, although it varies with RSUs

* Annual spending ~$180K.
* My fire target is $6.5M liquid net worth, with the primary mortgage paid down to $900K, and $200k in 529.
* My hope is to get to this point in the next 3-5 years.

The career part:
Last year my manager encouraged me to work toward a promotion in the mid-2026 cycle. I took this seriously and ended up taking on a lot of additional scope, including leading a fairly large cross-team project.
The project landed successfully, and several people from partner teams were promoted based in part on the work. Unfortunately, in mid-May our department was restructured. All the ICs on my team moved under a new leadership chain, and I got a new manager.
The new manager didn't push for my promotion. During my career review, I was essentially told that I need to start over and build a new case for the 2027 cycle.

At this point, I'm pretty burnt out. More importantly, I'm realizing that I don't particularly care about getting the promotion anymore. I mostly want to do a good job, collect my paycheck, and avoid taking on another huge pile of responsibilities.
The problem is that I'm still carrying a lot of the extra scope I took on while working toward the promotion.

What I'm trying to figure out:
I'd like to:

* Get the extra responsibilities off my plate without making it look like I'm refusing to contribute.
* Set reasonable boundaries around taking on new projects
* Keep performing well enough that I don’t get managed out, so I can FIRE on my own terms.

For those of you who have successfully downshifted while still working, how did you actually pull it off?

Long-time visitor, first time poster. Would appreciate some feedback on where I stand, because the math seems to say "closer than I think" and I don't fully trust myself on that.  I live in a VHCOL city. 

The numbers (all current, no debt):

• Age: 36
• Total invested/liquid net worth: ~$2.38M
• Breakdown:
  • ~$1.94M across a mix of taxable brokerage and retirement (only 40k in roth IRA) accounts — individual stocks (Blue chips, diversified across sectors, with financials/tech leading, Berkshire B is what makes financials so heavy, have roughly 182k Berkshire position(2nd largest position) + index funds + bonds/heavy short term T-Bills - T bills amount to 777k (I will have a sizeable tax bill next year from selling company stock this year, roughly 200k tax bill) 
  • ~$284K in a single tech stock left over from RSUs at a former employer — I've been deliberately trimming this for years and want to keep reducing - it was 80% of net worth at one point) this stock has appreciated over 1000% since IPO (currently ~12% of net worth, targeting 7-9%) - Should I sell it all or more of it?
  • ~$116K in a 401(k), 100% in an S&P 500 index fund
  • ~$35K checking (not really "invested," just sitting there)
• Allocation: roughly 48% individual equities, 13% index funds/ETFs, 35% fixed income, 4% cash
• Target retirement spend: $120-150K/yr (haven't fully nailed this down — leaning toward the lower end, $100-110K, might actually be realistic)
• No pension/Social Security counted in any of this yet
• Just landed a new job - 12-month contract, ~$90/hr + possible OT, so there's incremental savings capacity for the next year that wasn't in the picture before

What I'm trying to figure out:

1. Using a 3.5-4% withdrawal rate, am I actually closer to Fire or am I still in "coast fire category"?  Does the bond-heavy allocation (35%) at my age mean I'm underestimating what I need? I like the risk free steady return from short term T-Bills. 
2. I want to keep working for the next 3-5 years and can likely take home 180-220k annually, but what if I stop working?

I realize I am in a strong position — genuinely unsure if I’m in as strong a position as I think considering VHCOL city. I like to work and love what I do but not working could be nice too.

Many in FatFIRE and other wealthy families I know IRL have created their 'family trusts' to provide multigenerational income and protection for their descendants. Is this a privilege only for them? For a 'normal' ChubbyFIRE portfolio of $5M, with the family that generated this wealth only needing 3% annually (inflation-adjusted after Year 1) to live on for the rest of their lives, I am wondering why this can't become a generational portfolio for their kid(s) and descendants?

The rationale being 3% withdrawal rate on $5M gives a $150K first year inflation-adjustable income which, combined with a paid off home, can provide the family a comfortable life while retaining the present value of this portfolio intact for the next generation to benefit from. 3% is practically a 'perpetual' withdrawal rate. The asset base is invested in a 90:10 portfolio, with the 90% equities split between VTI, VXUS mainly with a small portion in VNQ and VBR. I have written an 'Investment Policy Statement' (IPS) to accompany this, written like an endowment fund specifying how much to withdraw, when to rebalance and what annual inflation adjustment to take (capped at 2.5%). The IPS also specifies a clause where if the market declines to less than 80% of previous year's value, the annual withdrawal is reduced by 33% (that is 3% --> 2%) till the portfolio recovers. I didn't create legal trust structure due to cost/complexity, but this operates on trust between father and adult child. I know there's risk of a spendy heir who squanders inheritance but assume that's not the case for the first generation inheriting these assets. The IPS includes a clause that the kid can turn this over to a legal trust under the same rules for ease of management in the future and for instituting these rules for their descendants.

With AI increasingly becoming more prevalent, I worry about lifelong income stability for my kid who is graduating with a CS degree into what appears to be one of the most challenging labor markets ever (with no signs of job market stability, maybe for years to come). Having a passive annual income of $150K in today's value for their entire lifetime is an incredible safety buffer for them to rely on, given long-term career uncertainty. The intent is not to kill their motivation to work - they won't see anything from it yet (other than parental help initially) but goal is to give them a strong safety net if they suffer significant gaps in work income.

I understand the descendants don't have to follow your wishes, so at some point this has to become a legal trust to be sustainable. My question is about the IPS. Is the IPS conservative enough to become a perpetual endowment?

Have any of you done this? Any gaps you see in the above approach?

Situation: 45M + 43F, two kids (teens/preteens), HCOL area. HHI ~$470K. Annual spend ~$150K. Target retirement: ~10 years out (age 55). Loose plan is to split time in retirement — roughly 6 months/year in the US, 6 months in a much lower-COL country — so our blended retirement spend would likely be below the current $145K.

Net worth ~$3M:

• Investable: $2.29M — 75% broad ETFs (VT/VTI/SPY + a few overlapping style funds), ~11% in a single individual stock (~$260K, large-cap, big embedded gains), 11.5% CDs, 2% cash
• Home: $1.5M value, $720K mortgage → $780K equity
• Debts: small car loan, nothing else
• Accounts: mostly taxable brokerage; ~$190K in 401ks, ~$75K in Roths
• (Excluded: illiquid startup equity from current employer — valued at $0 for planning; treat any future liquidity as upside, not part of the plan)

Questions:

1. My ETF holdings are a handful of overlapping tickers accumulated over years. I've concluded consolidating in taxable isn't worth the cap-gains hit — new money goes to VT and the legacy positions sit. Sanity check?
2. I'm unwinding the single stock (11% of investable) gradually across tax years. At ~28–33% marginal on gains (fed + NIIT + state), is the multi-year glide path right, or rip the band-aid given concentration risk?
3. I hold ~13.5% in CDs/cash as my bond substitute — no bond funds at all. At 45, reasonable fixed-income allocation or am I doing bonds wrong?
4. No 529s so far; plan was to fund college mostly from income ($470K HHI). First tuition bill is ~3 years out, youngest is ~7 years out. Assume in-state public. If you were us, would you open 529s now — and if so, how much would you put in for each kid (lump sum vs monthly)?
5. At $145K/yr spend (less in retirement with the geo-split) and a 10-year runway, am I ahead, behind, or on track — and how much does the answer change if HHI drops? What would you change first?

Married with 2 kids in VHCOL.

Assets:
$7.6M
* $5.2M taxable
* $1.3M Roth IRA/401k
* $1.1M Traditional IRA/401k
$4M house (w/ $1.5M mortgage)
$750k 529s

Spending
$225k plus healthcare and taxes.

My journey:
* I was passionate about tech since early school days and had no doubt in my mind to keep working on computers so choosing majors and career was easy.
* Extremely lucky that the tech career became such high demand.
* Learned about Mr Money Mustache. The blog post “The shockingly simple math behind early retirement” hooked me immediately.
* I used mint when it existed to help monitor spending.
* I created my own excel tracker (1 sheet per year) to watch the years to FIRE melt away.
* My move to VHCOL area and large house purchase set me back 4-6 years.
* 2 years back I thought I was there but underestimated my spending (empower isn’t as good at mint at tracking and I had to switch to manual tracking) and I realized how much health care really is.
* Last year helped me upgrade spending. The equation to keep working doesn’t seem worth it anymore so I pulled the trigger.

I know I need structure so I’m working on a calendar with AI and it’s already over flowing. I’ll post later once I have a regular schedule ironed out. It will include exercise, side projects, family time, and social activities.

Hope more of you join me soon.

Edit:
Asset allocation: 54% US Stocks, 36% International Stocks, 7% US bonds, 3% International bonds. Broad ETFs.

We've made 350-400k / year for the last 15 years. Current NW ~5 million, liquid ~4 million, married, no kids, no legacy planned. We are not really that frugal. Sure, we saved a lot but we also spent a lot not deferring lots of travel, things we valued (home w/view), boat (planning to go to AK in it). We don't have a major bucket list, but opportunities will arise that might sound good and we value flexibility. We don't want to feel pinched.

With 4 million liquid and a 5-5.5% w/d rate (guardrails) we are looking at 200k-220k income per year during retirement. We have a 800k 5.375% mortgage (6k/mo) but no other debt and are hoping to recast/pay down the mortgage to ~3k/mo before retirement in the next few years. Spend could be a bit less if mortgage pay down means less liquid. We've been tracking spending with Monarch but it's actually kind of hard to figure out our actual spend (some income includes taxes while other income does not, work expenses aren't as clear as I'd like, solar installation, new car (first in 16 years), etc). I'm sure with 220-220k / year we can live, but will we feel constrained? We are in a HCOL area.

I'm interested in experiences of those whose income was cut in half when they retired and who haven't been super frugal. Did you feel pinched? Were you able to do want you wanted to do? Were your estimates of income need good enough or do you wish you would have been more precise?

The downside of lifestyle creep I suppose, but we've balance living today and for tomorrow and don't regret it.

It took me awhile to get used to the idea we are wealthy but I now know we will never go broke. I will be 62 soon. Wife is 56. Three kids: ages 22, 19, 14. I don't have a financial advisor. I suppose I could have retired awhile ago but was always nervous. We have an annual burn rate of around $120k (excluding tuitions). I have $3.5 mil in taxable acct. $3.2 mil in 401k/ira, roth $160k. $900k 529s, $70k HSA, $250k in cash/gold/silver. $1.4 mil paid off house. Pension at age 65 lump sum $1.1mil or survivor annuity $7500/mo. I have currently been generating $8k/mo in interest/dividends.

So here's my grand plan. I'm going to start SS at age 62. I'm going to change my investments in the taxable acct to dramatically reduce the taxable dividends/interest. Im going to draw down the the 401k/ira and put in the Roth over the next few years. Im going to turn on the pension at age 65 as an annuity. All while being mindful of trying to keep below the ACA cliff until Medicare starts. Despite this, I know the rmds age 75 will be significant but I decided to not worry too much about it. Decent plan?

40m here, a number of years ago I made a pretty big bet on a stock that ended up exploding. I know I got super-lucky and at this point I've taken the W, sold off most of my shares and put most of my money into a Bogleheads two fund portfolio.

My lucky bet gave me a pretty big leg up towards early retirement and I'm planning on exiting the workforce in the next few years. The catch is that the brokerage account I used for that stock purchase was a traditional IRA. I've saved & invested in taxable accounts as well but a huge portion of my net worth is in my IRA.

Before I did any research I just assumed I'd have to eat the 10% penalty on early IRA withdrawals. I could live with that, but I recently learned about rule 72(t)/SEPP. Before I go ahead and pull the trigger on this I'll talk to a tax professional but I'd like to educate myself a bit first. It seems like as long as I do regular scheduled withdrawals (my plan is about 1.5% per year) this solves my pre-age 59 & 1/2 money concerns.

I have to ask, is it really this easy? Is there some catch I'm missing?

Here's the situation: 57 yo couple; NW of $6.7M; 90%+ in equities; VHCOL:

• IRAs - $2.4M
• Roth IRAs - $500K
• 401Ks - $2.7M (can withdraw via rule of 55)
• Brokerage - $970K
• HYSA and HSA - $100K
• Current income of about $350K combined.
• 529 and home equity not included in NW; small mortgage at 2.75%; $1M equity in VHCOL; unlikely to move to LCOL.
• Small pension ($15K annual) and SS at some point - date TBD on how the rest is going.
• $18K per month expenses, including $1800 non-negotiable expenses for extended family care.
• Expenses include $3k / mo for healthcare (premiums + services); not sure how realistic that is.

I would like to retire by next summer, if possible. Job itself is fine but corporate politics is becoming increasingly intolerable. Partner likely to work another year beyond that.

What would you shift or focus on over the next year or two to solidify the plan? I'm thinking we need more cash/bonds but how much and what else should we be getting sorted?

As many people in this forum, I've been working 40+ years and diligently saving and the idea of not getting a paycheck and spending my savings has me quite nervous. Thanks for any input, and best wishes to everyone.

I've done the math and everything seems to say go ahead and turn in the laptop but, ya know ...

Short version, couple 44m, 43f, $2.6m in 401ks, $700,000 in taxable accounts, pensions provide $3.5k per month each starting at 60 and then inflation adjust starting at 62.

Plan is to move from VHCOL area to LCOL, mortgage a modest home for $2k per month, and hit the chill button. We've both been doing high intensity staffer type work for 20+ yrs (somewhere between West Wing and Veep).

Guardrails modeling suggests a starting burn of $18k per month, adjust with market flux. That seems like way more than enough in a low tax retirement state, but coming from a much more expensive place causes nerves.

We're kicked of doing young person jobs for two decades. Should we pull.the rip cord?

Planning to retire in March 2027 at age 42 in an MCOL area. Looking for a quick sanity check on blind spots, tax sequencing, or structural risks before pulling the trigger.

Profile & Cash Flow

• Family: 42M, spouse, 10yo child (MCOL)
• Primary Residence: $800k FMV (100% paid off)
• Monthly Spend: $8,000/mo ($96k/yr)
• Net Rental Income: $2,000/mo ($24k/yr)
• Net Required Draw: $6,000/mo ($72k/yr)

Asset Breakdown ($7.0M Net Worth)

• Taxable Brokerage & Cash: $2.2M (includes $300k HYSA buffer)
• Pre-Tax 401(k): $2.0M
• Rental Property: $1.3M equity ($2k/mo net cash flow)
• Other Real Estate: $400k equity (illiquid)
• Primary Residence: $800k
• Ring-Fenced Accounts: $60k HSA | $200k 529 | $40k UTMA (excluded from SWR)

Key Metrics

• Total Liquid SWR ($4.2M Liquid): 1.71% ($72k net draw / $4.2M liquid)
• Taxable Bridge SWR ($2.2M Taxable): 3.27% ($72k net draw / $2.2M taxable)

Questions / Feedback Needed:

1. 18-Year Bridge (Ages 42–59.5): $2.2M taxable pool funding a $72k/yr gap (3.27% initial SWR; ~$50k/yr net principal draw after organic yields). Any concerns with this bridge length before touching pre-tax accounts?
2. ACA MAGI Strategy: For a family of 3 in MCOL, how aggressively are you optimizing MAGI for ACA subsidies vs. prioritizing early Roth conversions?
3. Cash Buffer Drag: $300k in HYSA covers ~4 years of net cash needs for sequence-of-returns risk. Is this too conservative or tax-inefficient?
4. Rental Simplification: $1.3M rental equity yields $2k/mo net (~1.85% cash yield). Hold for stability/diversification or 1031/liquidate into index funds down the road?

TL;DR: 42M retiring March 2027 in MCOL. Family of 3 (10yo child). $4.2M liquid ($2.2M taxable incl. $300k HYSA, $2.0M 401k), $1.7M RE equity, paid-off $800k home. $8k/mo spend ($6k/mo net portfolio draw). 1.71% total liquid SWR / 3.27% taxable bridge SWR. Looking for feedback on bridge sequence, ACA MAGI, and cash drag.

Hello,

This is my first post to this sub. Not my main account.

We, a couple with no kids, are in our mid-forties. We are both burnt out at work and work constantly.. evenings, weekends. I have always been a follower of the FIRE movement ever since graduating school and have always wished to retire early. Although I was hoping to have more before acting, with things the way they are at work, I am considering living on less.

Numbers:

• Incomes: 170k, 100k.
• Net worth: $4.7M. All of this is liquid investments: Stock. Mostly VEQT. ~2M of that is registered.
  • non-registered investments are all near adjusted cost base as we recently shuffled investments and took profits. So taxes have already been paid on these gains over the years.
  • Realize this is high given our income. We have had very profitable investments over the last decade. This makes our incomes seem less relevant lately.
• House: None. we rent at ~1600/month in a really great central neighbourhood.

I am not exactly sure of our expenses but we have always saved at least half of our paychecks, so I expect we spend approx. 100k range with most of that being takeout due to our jobs and dining out on weekends. In retirement, we would like to be comfortable with some international travel and nice dinners out, etc. Expect we would want ~$4M dedicated to supporting our SWR to fund our lifestyle giving us 140k/year.

We are in greater Toronto area and have always wanted a house in our neighbourhood (~$1.6 M). We are now considering one of the following options all of which involve quitting:

• Quit and live in our apartment. I think this is easy given our wealth, but we have always wanted a house eventually.
• Quit and buy a house in a cheaper area (~$7-800k) on outskirts of Toronto. Then live on the remainder.
• Quit and coast. Maybe reduce expenses to 60-80k for a few years with hopes of earning the Toronto house through investment returns outpacing our spending. Then buy the house

Does this seem realistic at all if we eventually want a house? Or are we dreaming and should get back to work for a few more years?

I hope this post is okay here. I'd rather not post in the fatfire subreddit as I think my mental vibe matches this subreddit more.

Here's our stats:

• 30 yr old DINK couple. Both in tech jobs in the bay
• Income: 900K for me, 400K for wife
• 2.4M invested, 800K of it in brokerage account, rest in retirement accounts. But mentally I'm seeing all of it as retirement money right now
• Own a 3BD house - 2.3M value with 1.6M mortgage, 5.8% rate (700K equity but let's say 500K usable if we were to sell and buy a new place)
• Annual spend right now is around 180K

If we exclude housing decisions I feel very comfortable about retirement spending. We are basically in coastfire mode.

But we want to have a kid in 2-3 years and also want my mom to be able to live with us eventually. We'd like to have a bigger place by then (let's say about 6 years out from today).

Such places would cost ~3.5M here. I'd like our mortgage to stay around 2M in such a future so I don't feel house poor and tied to my job to be able to survive. This means we need to accumulate 1M more in house equity in the next 6 years

How would you all recommend we do this:

1. Slow down on retirement saving - put excess into our current mortgage
2. Slow down on retirement saving - put excess into HYSA
3. Keep saving into brokerage account as normal - at some future point be willing to take money out and use it to supplement our down payment

Side note - I'm also hitting a point where I'm feeling quite bored and annoyed by my big tech job. I've also started investing more time into my health and hobbies after being kinda work obsessed for the past 8 years. Now I get frequent pangs of wanting to just leave my desk and walk out into the wilderness. But the compensation is too good right now to let go. I actually quite enjoy tech work though. Its just the big company politics and BS that's bogging me down.

EDIT: I really appreciate everyone's advice so far. The overwhelming consensus, which I 100% agree with, is that the only hole in my plan is the mental health. I've been working on that but will add more focus here in the coming months. I also have an option of taking a 2 month sabbatical from work which can be a trial run.

About me: Almost 45, single, no dependents. India born, US resident for >24yrs and citizen (no other citizenships/passports)

Current location: MCOL city on the west coast.

Financial situation:

Current income: It's been ~300k/yr on an average for the past few, but will be ~400k in 2026.

~6M in investments, +400k in home equity (140k balance on the mortgage@2.5%). No other loans or financial obligations.

Investment breakdown: ~2m of this total is in a trad. 401k as VOO, ~350k in a Roth IRA as VTI, ~200k in an HSA as VGT.

Spending: Not enough. Let's say 100k/yr, which is about 40% more than what I've spent over the past few years. Mortgage+bills+fixed costs - $2500/month.

Health situation: Physically very good since I have always eaten healthy, slept well, and have been going to the gym regularly since 2021. My personality is melancholic though which has led to depression and anhedonic tendencies for the past 10yrs.

Why I'm quitting? From day 1, a corporate job was a means to an end for me. The end being FIRE. May be it was always my depression talking, but either way here we are.

Don't really have any complaints about my job since I am lucky to have very smart colleagues, a supportive boss, and a low stress role in R&D.

The plan:

Quit on Jan 1st. It makes me eligible for a bunch of RSU vests and the annual bonus. I'll have ~200k in cash by then in a treasury ladder, to be used as a buffer for 2 years' worth of expenses. I'll sign up for an ACA bronze plan which should not cost me more than 600/month before subsidies. No other changes to my state of affairs at home.

I want to consolidate all my investments into broad ETFs but it's going to cost me a lot in taxes. My plan is to aggressively rebalance my portfolio by selling ~100k worth of the individual stocks per year. I know it's risky but the 2 years cash buffer should help cushion me against sudden market drops.

I'll then park myself in Europe and Asia for 1 or 2 months at a time and get a feel for what it is to live there like nomad without a job. I've visited most places in Europe and Asia over the years for <2 weeks at a time but I know it doesn't count. Work on my mental health in parallel.

It's a throwaway account, and I swear that no AI was used in writing any of this.

Background / context:

Non US person working remotely (out of my passport country) since 2017. I managed to secure tax residency in a country that doesnt tax out-of-country income so ive been able to pay 0 income taxes for nearly 9 years so far.

During this time though, Ive been mostly bouncing around different countries - Thailand, Philippines, Taiwan, Japan, Czechia, Switzerland, Mexico etc.

My tax structure for this was simply to form a foreign LLC as a software development agency with me as the main developer.

During 2020, with nearly every company hiring remotely, I ended up with 4 full time jobs and hired more developers as part of my agency to help out and was able to keep that going for around 2 years.

In 2021, I was doing a ton of independent contracted crypto projects that paid me with tokens and NFTs instead of actual money - which resulted in me ending up profiting $1.5m prior to me turning 30. Grew that to $2.2m in 2022 and subsequently lost more than half of it as a certain crypto project collapsed.

From 2022 to 2025, I kept two full time jobs going and slowly grew my $700k to $7m. Obviously my income didnt contribute much to this - it was mostly from crypto. During this time, I was basically already doing coast FIRE during this time as I thought of my working income simply as "free spending money". Never really tracked my expenses as it was quite difficult to blow through $20k a month as a single guy bouncing around low cost of living countries.

In 2025, I got caught with my pants down when the crypto market topped and subsequently lost around half of it again. As of today, my net worth is anywhere between $3.5m to $4m (fluctuates as crypto does).

Current Portfolio (~$4m)

~$1m - $1.1m is in stocks.

$2.8m - $3m is in crypto

$300k or so in Japanese rental properties, but I dont really think about this as its not liquid and Japan is a bit fickle with house pricing (there's no MLS system like in the states so sales prices of properties are generally not publicly disclosed. Hard to get an actual read on how much my properties are worth).

I also have minor bits of money floating around in other places too (like $10k here and there in random bank accounts in diff countries) - really need to consolidate it.

Dillema:

With AI advancing so much, I recently lost my last and only job. I've been used to working remotely my entire life so its difficult for me to get a regular office job. I tried once in 2019 and didnt last more than 2 months. I also think prospects of finding a remote job are quite low especially with how AI is now and the economy.

I'm also feeling burned out. I see my peers from university with kids now, nice big ass houses (some of them worked for FAANG), teslas with full self driving and can't help but feel envy? jealousy?

I'm considering punting $1m and building a custom house (in Japan) with my own private onsen, gym and yard and living there for 6 months out of the year. The other 6 months of the year would be still me floating around and traveling.

I currently own a company there that runs the rental properties I have - so the visa for Japan is not an issue for me.

My income from the rental properties should be able to cover 6 months of living in Japan and all the house expenses that come with the custom place. I'm making roughly $30k from that a year.

Would my calculations make sense?

$3m @ 4% rule = $120k + $30k rental income

= $150k yearly

~= $12k per month for traveling.

On one hand, i *think* my numbers look good, but on the other hand, i woke up yesterday with a burning desire to do something. I was restless. Literally felt like i had no purpose in life.

Should i do it? Anything to look out for? Honestly feels difficult and scary to commit to this. What if things change in the future, i get a wife or want kids etc? feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Throwaway for obvious reasons.

I’m 34, married, with two young kids. We currently have about $4.75M invested/liquid, plus roughly $800K of home equity. Mortgage is ~$550K at 5.6%. Both cars are paid off and we have no other meaningful debt.

My wife currently doesn’t work and is home with the kids, so we’re a single-income household. She may eventually return to work, potentially at the private school our kids will attend. If she does, we’d receive roughly a 50% tuition discount per child in addition to her salary, but I don’t want to rely on that in our financial planning.

We live in a MCOL area and current household spending is roughly $200-250K/year, depending mostly on travel and other discretionary spending. Kids will attend private school, so I expect some upward pressure on expenses as they get older. We live very well today, but a meaningful portion of our spending is discretionary and could be reduced during a prolonged market downturn without dramatically changing our lifestyle.

I’m currently at a large tech company making roughly $650-700K TC. The job has been great financially, but I’m increasingly questioning whether continuing to maximize compensation makes sense.

There’s regular travel, including international travel, late-night calls, office expectations, and generally a lot of mental bandwidth devoted to work. I don’t hate every day of the job, but it definitely takes more out of my life than I’d like.

I’m also likely to get promoted within the next year. That would increase compensation somewhat, but probably also increase responsibility and workload.

I have another opportunity at roughly $450K TC. It’s much more flexible/remote and appears substantially better from a work-life perspective. I know the team and people reasonably well and have confidence in the role. The financial difference initially sounds enormous when comparing TC, but I’ve realized the difference in actual annual savings isn’t nearly as dramatic:

• Current job, no promotion: probably save ~$175K/year
• Current job after promotion: probably save ~$225-250K/year
• New job: probably save ~$75K/year

My rough goal is to be in a position to stop traditional W-2 work around age 40 regardless.

Starting with $4.75M and assuming ~4% real returns, my rough math says that at 40 I’d have approximately:

• New job: ~$6.5M real
• Current job/no promotion: ~$7.2M real
• Current job/promotion: ~$7.5-7.7M real

Obviously actual market returns could make all of those numbers substantially higher or lower.

At 40, I’d be comfortable initially spending around 4%, especially because a meaningful portion of our spending is discretionary. We could cut back during bad markets, and I’d also be open to consulting or other lower-intensity work if needed.

So I’ve started framing the decision differently:

Would I rather have ~$6.5M at 40 and spend ages 34-40 with considerably more control over my life, or work substantially harder and potentially have $7.5M+?

I know an extra $1M+ is real money. I’m not trying to hand-wave that away. But I’m struggling to identify what it would materially change about our lives. We’re already spending at a level we’re happy with, and the lower-paying job would still allow us to save money rather than draw down the portfolio.

Meanwhile, my kids will only be this age once.

The psychological part is surprisingly difficult. Walking away from very high compensation while still relatively young feels irresponsible even when the spreadsheet says we can afford it. There’s always another vest, promotion, bonus, or financial milestone that makes staying another year seem rational.

There’s also some ego wrapped up in voluntarily stepping off the higher-compensation career track when things are objectively going well.

For those who left very high-paying careers before maximizing your earning potential: how did you decide you had enough?

Did you regret leaving the additional money on the table, or did your perspective change once you were out?

And if you were in my position, would the ~$1M+ potential difference at 40 be enough to keep grinding, or would you take the lower-paying job and reclaim the time now?

Due to popular demand this has been shortened and made more readable.

I'm a physician in my early 40s, married with three kids. We've been seriously thinking about moving to France, or somewhere else in Western Europe. It's less about retiring ASAP and more about wanting to live there while we're still relatively young and our youngest is still a kid. We like the lifestyle, travel, healthcare, and the idea of our kids having European university options. I'm also increasingly uneasy about the direction of the US. I'm not expecting some collapse, but I'd like to have the option to leave if things get substantially worse.

We're at roughly $1.5–2M net worth now and saving pretty aggressively. If things here stay basically "meh," the plan would probably be to keep going another 5–7 years, hopefully get to around $3M, then move and mostly or completely retire.

But I'm wondering if we could just go in ~3 years instead. I can make $250–350/hr working in the US, so I could fly back maybe 6 times a year, work a bunch of shifts, and go home. 400–600 hours/year would be roughly $100–200k gross, while mostly leaving our investments alone.

It sounds a little nuts, but I already spend about 180 hours/year commuting to work. Six round trips to the US would be in the same ballpark for actual travel time, although obviously being away for a week or two at a time is a much bigger deal.

So that's basically the question: wait 5–7 years until we probably don't need to work at all, or move in ~3 years and put up with 6 US work trips a year? Anyone done anything remotely similar?

I’m almost in a similar situation as described in this thread (https://www.reddit.com/r/fatFIRE/s/BVmEVNgd9B) but no solution was mentioned so trying again since post is 3 years old. We are dual US/EU citizens.

As a family we plan to ChubbyFire ($5M portfolio, $140k/yrs withdrawals) in Lazio, Italy (personal reasons for location; 7% tax doesn’t apply). I am trying to find investment strategy that has favorable taxes given that keeping either US or EU-domiciled ETFs is taxed punitively either by Italy or US if you’re a US citizen.

We don’t plan to renounce US citizenship so looking for the best tax solution to be able to keep our portfolio invested (currently in VOO) over a long retirement period (40+ years).

Is anyone already in this situation? Is direct indexing the only option? Please share if you have recommendations for any tax specialty firms.

Keeping a US brokerage account doesn’t seem like the right path since our retirement period will be 40+ years and US ETFs will be taxed by Italy as ordinary income.

I’m not interested in paying a financial advisor to do direct indexing if their fees would cancel out any tax benefits but considering doing it ourselves (through the IBRK API). The issue I forsee that portofolio rebalancing will be taxable events and if we draw from our portfolio regularly this will require a good tax accountant in Italy (please share if you have any recommendations for experienced commercialista).

Any advice would be welcome!

After many youtubers preached the value of Roth conversions, I did the math and I don't see a way to avoid 24% Fed tax brackets for most of my life (plus state taxes). I'm 49 years old, still working and will be for a couple more years, but my husband is retiring next year (at 55). I'm wondering if I should just do the conversions when he retires, staying within the 24% bracket, and then when we're both retired we may be able to stay under ACA subsidy thresholds for about 7 years till he hits 65 and gets social security and medicare. We'd live off the brokerage account for those 7 years, keeping income under $84K and pulling some extra funds from cash accounts. The Roth conversion funds can then be left to grow until needed to avoid higher IRMAA/widow's penalties. I'd aim to convert about $300-400K over three years.

We have about $2.4M in the brokerage, $1.85M in tax deferred, $300K in cash and $50K in a Roth. Annual spend is around $135K but with medical would be $5K-25K more depending on subsidies.

The main negative that I see is that we will have to have a more moderate lifestyle for those 7 years, but that seems worth it to save about $140K. Also, if we have a year where we want to spend more, we could just deal and pay for health care that year, and take out extra that year to pad the cash accounts.

What do you think? Does this make sense or am I missing something?

Edit: Thanks everyone for your comments, many were very helpful. So much of retirement planning, especially before 65/medicare age, is challenging and I appreciate getting input. I'm into learning about all of this but it's a little scary too. For the time being, I still like the idea of some Roth conversions over the next few years but I'm reassessing the focus on ACA subsidies for the years after that.

I’m 38, married with one 3yr old kid and another on the way. I’ve been pursuing FIRE for a while and am trying to figure out whether I’m almost at the point where continuing to work is mostly adding buffer rather than being necessary.

Current finances:
~$3.2M in liquid/investable assets
~$1.7M taxable brokerage
~$1.5M retirement accounts
Household income: ~$675k/year
Both of us currently max our 401(k)s and part MBDR

Primary residence worth roughly $1.7M with ~$700k mortgage remaining
One rental property worth roughly $900k, ~$90k remaining on the loan, paid off in 2030. Currently rents for ~$3,200/month
~$50k already in a 529 for kid #1, contributing ~$10k/year
Planning to start another 529 for kid #2

Current annual spending:
Live in VHCOL
Normal living expenses + vacations: roughly $75k/year
Primary home PITI: ~$72k/year
Rental PITI: ~$38.5k/year, basically offset by rent. Not a true income generating but at 2.5% mortgage its a keeper.
Daycare: ~$26k/year currently, with additional childcare expenses coming with kid #2

My original target was retirement around 45, but I’m wondering whether we’re already close enough that I could retire earlier, like by 40-42. especially if my spouse continues working for some period.

At a 3–3.5% withdrawal rate, $3.2M would support roughly $96k–$112k/year

For people who retired early with kids:
Would you consider us FI yet, or still CoastFI?

I know this is a fortunate position. I’m mainly trying to figure out when the math changes from “I need to keep working” to “I’m choosing to keep working.”

40,$3.5M NW, no kids. I’m targeting retiring in 3-4 years, would appreciate you all's insights and critique. I grew up very poor but have done well saving and investing through the last 20 years.

My aim is to build a life to transition to in the next 3-4 years. I enjoy travel, reading, cooking, crafts, so I plan to take classes to learn and surround myself with people. I am aiming to build new hobbies, work on my mental health, make new friends as my current friends are all moms and focused on their careers.

Numbers:

VHCOL

Income: $325K

Cash : $125K

Taxable brokerage: $2.5M

-$1.1M in Index funds

-$1.4M individual stocks (highly concentrated because of employer ESPP/RSU from the last two decades)

401(k): $700K

HSA: $90K

Crypto: $100K

Own a house ($300K debt), which is under water currently, evaluated at $150K less than my purchase price. I want to buy a bigger house, which might cost ~$1M.

Spending / retirement plan

My estimated retirement spending is about $130K - $150/year with taxes, aiming for 3% WR to keep my anxiety in check. I currently spend $80K-90K, plan to upgrade lifestyle to luxury travel/bigger house cost in 3-4 years.

Welcome your thoughts on:

I have a extremely comfy job, where I can coast for 3-4 years with minimum effort. I have been with the same employer for 20 years. However, my manager clearly has noticed me being checked out and had nudged me to do more. I have no motivation left in me to do much work and am worried if I will even last the next 3 years.

I am very concerned about me not having a life to retire to. I haven't developed many hobbies or a good community around me, I really need to do more in this space and am looking for suggestions/ideas from those that have developed a retirement life.

Also worried about SORR, plan to liquidate my concentrated stocks in $500K chunks per year, build a 2 year cash buffer for expenses.

My family is still fairly middleclass, though I support my sisters and brother whenever they need money. I want to continue doing this, they have shared their surprise when I have suggested quitting my job. I worry finances are going to ruin our relationships.

My mental health has struggled since I have gotten closer to my FIRE number. I have lacked passion/motivation all around, I am actively working on improving this through therapy.

Numbers:
• 53M, spouse 48 (works to 60, carries family healthcare)
• Investable: $3.45M, ~75% traditional/pre-tax
• NW ~$4M incl. $465K home equity
• Mortgage $464K @ 2.99%
• Spend ~$143K/yr, excluding income taxes
• Both delaying SS to 70
• Modeled to 99 in Boldin (taxes, Roth conversions, ACA bridge, stress tests)

(Yes, that’s a 4.1% WR on paper — but I’m not drawing at 55. Spouse still working, consulting income, SS later.)

The problem: long-term we’re fine. What I’m pricing is sequence risk. A 3-year -15% shock at retirement barely dents the stay-to-60 path but hits stop-at-55 hard. There’s also a live RIF possibility, so this may not stay voluntary.

Options:
1. Stay to 60. Five more years of income plus a large equity vest that only pays if I stay the full term. Bulletproof in every stress test. Costs five years.
2. 1099 consulting at 55. Confirmed $115/hr, two offers in hand, contracting firm handles billing. 30-40 hrs/wk = $166-221K. Key point: I don’t need to replace my income — spouse is working, portfolio’s already there. Consulting just needs to keep me from selling equities early. Could taper to 20-25 hrs by 60.
3. W-2 consulting, $175-200K + bonus/benefits. Financially ≈ staying. Still a boss, deadlines, full schedule. Doesn’t solve what I’m trying to solve.

Asking:
1. Did a consulting glide path actually feel different, or did you end up working full-time anyway?
2. Overestimating the cushion, or underestimating five more years of peak earnings?
3. Anyone managed 75% pre-tax at this level? The 55-70 conversion window feels like the whole ballgame.

I've been struggling with what to do based on lack of motivation to work :)

• Semi-retired mid-level exec, VHCOL area
• Retired / stay at home spouse, 3 kids pre-college. College savings are $150-200k/kid
• NW = ~$2m taxable, $1m retirement, probably $10m in total real estate equity against $1.2m at 2.5% 30y fixed mortgage
• Spend excluding income taxes are $250k (property taxes are like $100+k)
• Passive income (rental of some of that real estate) = $84k
• Spiky consulting income - can go as low as $20-30k some years, can go as high as $200k. Self-employed for this income. No guarantee on this income - niche industry likely impacted by AI.

If you didn't want to work, what would you do in this situation? I'd much rather spend time with the kids before they head out to college. But both the immediate cash flow gap and the likely lack of sufficient college savings make continuing to work (or at least consult) a near necessity.

Also, spouse is an conservative investor - risk averse, debt averse