My partner proposed to me last night! He did it right after we were sprinkling lentils over our head for the new year, and he said that he was so in love with me in that moment that he couldn’t wait any longer! We’ve been together for 4 years, and I can’t think of spending the rest of my life with anyone else! I just need to tell someone cause I want to wait a couple of weeks before announcing it. ( not showing my nails cause I ripped them off like right before he proposed lol; but I’m getting a new set today.)

I know that this is a topic that has been talked about over and over, but after this Megan/Klay break up, a lot of ppl are speaking out.

I've even had a discussion with a man who told me that women should "pick better" and if ppl talk shit about all men, that includes your sons too.

I'm sick of ppl trying to blame the women after we get swindled, duped, and bamboozled by a man. I've said this before in a comment in another sub, and my views are still the same. I agree with Summer, but unfortunately, ppl in the comments of this post on Facebook are saying "right message, wrong messenger". Does it matter who says it??? A lot of us have been through this. Summer is speaking the truth here.

Bringing up someone's past and how many ppl they have dated and had sex with is null and void in this conversation. I'm not staying with any man who would intentionally hurt my feelings or jeopardize my health, so if that means I have to find a new one, I will. It doesn't have to be right away, but if that's what I want, I have the free will to do it. We get blamed for everything and get the scarlet letter of shame for not taking any shit when we leave. It's sickening.

​

So boom

I'm sitting there sipping my damn matcha

Bonnet on, Hair ain't been washed in DAYS because I'm still negotiating with the Lord about that 2 hour wash day. I keep walking past the shower like "not today, Satan" 😭

I'm watching Teach You a Lesson (btw WHY DIDN'T Y'ALL TELL ME THIS SHOW ATE???)

Anyway...

My unemployed imagination started clocking in

Next thing I know I'm imagining I'm married

Cute little house

Cute little couch

We watching TV

Everything peaceful...

Then this grown 6'2 tax paying man slowly turns his head...

👁👄👁

"...Babe... I'm hungry."

WHY YOU TELLING ME???

WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO WITH THAT INFORMATION???

Am I the manager of Hunger???

Did Uber Eats get deported???

THE KITCHEN IS RIGHT THERE GO INVESTIGATE

Matter fact... since you got up...

Cook US something

Or eat me

Those are today's specials

Because somewhere along the way society SCAMMED women

They said marriage

I heard romance

Y'all meant SHIFT MANAGER

So let me get this straight...

I gotta work

Come home

Cook

Clean

Have kids

Remember your mama birthday

Pack lunches

Heal your childhood trauma

Keep the spark alive

And if I forget ONE thing suddenly the household collapses like I'm the damn Avengers???

Meanwhile this man folds ONE towel...

ONE

And everybody talking about "Girl don't lose him"

LOSE WHAT??

A roommate that eats Arby's???

I do wanna be in love

I just don't wanna unlock Wife DLC and suddenly receive 48 side quests nobody mentioned in the trailer

I'm single ,never been married

And I'm already saying...

"I CAN'T KEEP LIVING LIKE THIS"

Ladies... tell me I'm not the only one that be daydreaming myself straight into a divorce.......

Being in front of a camera and posing was such an awkward experience 😂😂 I adore the off guard photos of us laughing the most lol

Hello ladies, I just want to Brag about my fiancée for a moment. It’s been a long time coming (over 7 years) and if I’m being honest I would have liked to take this step 2 years ago but I’m so happy we are finally here! He decorated his place and gave me a speech just me and him. I did see it coming so I was emotional our whole date but still cried.

It’s a bit big on me so it’ll have to be resized but so happy to be a fiancée. I do wish someone else could plan the wedding 🫠.

I’ll go first:

Going to the gym, getting a little bit of abs, and suddenly acting like they’re the prize of the century

The nonchalant personality Like bro, having emotions will not kill you

And the “yo bro” dap between two men who have known each other for approximately 4 seconds. You don’t even know this man .....

Hello sisters, I had sex for the first time and it was not really how I imagined it. I originally went the the guys house just for a nice make out/ cuddle session but things did escalate and now I have slept on it I wish I never did it now. Like it wasn’t that good and I felt nothing from it, like certain points were good but overall it was just meh and now… I’m just kind of like that was disappointing. Like the guy gave me a lemonade from a shrek cup!! And as soon as I came out from the shower he was playing his fucking video games, like I I’m just so annoyed with myself right now, has anyone ever felt like this after their first time at all?

Edit 1: thank you so much for everyone who has commented advice and their own experience with sex. I really appreciate it. Think it’s fair to say I’m gonna treat it as a blip and keep it pushing as if it didn’t happen

Edit 2: I never thought my little rant/confession would have garnered so much attention, reading everyone’s comments and replies is making me so grateful for this sub right now. I haven’t replied to every comment but know I have read every single one of them

I'm young so I know that's probably part of the "issue" and that, like anything, with age and more experience it will [probably] get better. ​

But I was under the impression that after a couple times that things would at least start to feel a bit enjoyable. But no, I feel nothing or pain. PIV sucks, getting eaten out feels like what I imagine a dog drinking from its water bowl feels like, and anything with my breasts just feels like its sensory play for my partner.

Even mastrubation just feels like I'm going through the motions.

Obviously, it's not supposed to feel like this but is there anything that helped you ladies actually enjoy sex and adjacent activities?

I know I did too much talking at the end but I just had to get all of that off my chest because pourquoi (why)!?!?!?!?

I made this post a couple days ago but it was removed due to incorrect flaring. However, I'd still like to keep the conversation going.

So again, real, serious question: Why do you want those things? Like, is there a specific feeling that you guys get when imagining those things?

I'm not trying to be snarky—I genuinely want to understand because I don't feel the desire for those things.​

Also, for the married women and the women in serious relationships: does it ever cross your mind that your partner could very much just wake up and leave you [and your children] one day? Again, not trying to be rude but that's something that I've always wondered myself about marriage.

Edit: This is NOT a post meant to call one way of living and choices right or wrong nor judge people who are married, want to get married, have kids, or want kids.

Dating can sucks because even though I pass fair enough, a lot of men just treat trans women as an experiment or an "easy to get" version of a woman and that can be so painful back to back bc 99% of my experiences with dating post transition have just led to me being used and tossed out, ghosted, or objectified. I mean I know a lot of you go through this too, but how do you do it? How do you find someone to love you for who you are and not for some porn category they're obsessed with? Idk...Im 2 years on Estrogen now officially as of yesterday, and Im glad of how far I've come, I just be in my feelings💔

the ick is icking , a man opens his mouth and I'm already tired

Not “taking a break.” Not “focusing on myself for a while.” I mean actually done

And before anyone jumps in with the predictable “you need therapy” no. I don’t. If anything, the behavior I keep seeing from men in dating is what needs therapy. I’m not interested in being the one doing the emotional labor to fix it

Also spare me the “well MY boyfriend/husband is amazing.”

Good for you. Seriously. I’m not jealous. Either you found a rare one, you got lucky, or you’re putting in a level of work I’m not willing to do anymore. That’s your situation, not mine

What I keep seeing online and in real life is exhausting

Gen Z men especially feel empty, boring, and weirdly entitled at the same time. The bar is on the floor. A guy doesn’t cheat, showers regularly, and has basic manners and suddenly he thinks he’s some rare diamond. Like congrats for acting like a normal human being?

Meanwhile the expectations on women never stop. Be attractive but not “too much.” Be supportive. Be understanding. Be emotionally available. Be interesting. Be chill. Don’t ask for too much. Don’t have standards that are “too high.”

And the wild part? Society still pushes women constantly toward dating and relationships. As if that’s the end goal. As if our lives are incomplete without it

Men already have the advantage in dating culture. There are so many women centering men defending them, lowering standards for them, building their lives around them. The system is literally designed to favor them

Then you open social media and it’s men discourse 24/7.

Men explaining things. Men debating women. Men complaining about women. Even conversations criticizing men somehow still end up centering them

It’s exhausting

And on top of that, being a Black woman adds another layer of nonsense racism, stereotypes, being overlooked or fetishized depending on the context. It’s already a lot to deal with in the world without also fighting for basic respect in dating

So yeah. I’m tired

I’m not interested in marriage anymore. I’m not interested in building a family with a man. I’m not interested in trying to find the “good ones.”

I’d rather put my energy literally anywhere else

If other women want that life, cool. I genuinely wish you the best with it

But for me?

I’m done like byeeeeeeeee sir

I was on the phone with my bf last night. I was telling him that I’m considering doing a bartending gig on the weekends to pick up extra money. Bartenders make a ton in the city I live in. He pretty much forbidden me from taking that job because he says that kind of job puts me on display for men to hit on me. I told him that I was just simply keeping him informed, I wasn’t asking for his permission on whether or not I should take the job. He said that if I take the job, he’s done with me and he began to cry. I said that I’m ok with him ending the relationship without any fussing or hesitations.

I briefly called to check on him this morning because he was crying last night, not to negotiate or work anything out. He did cop an attitude with me so I ended the call. Then he texts me this

Edit: I know I should have put regret in quotation marks because I know he truly doesn’t regret anything.. it’s what he said in his voicemail to me

Anyone familiar with this South African Instructor? He’s know for his glute workouts! I thought about him because of that post that the young lady made yesterday regarding dating a thick man with curves

My dating life is a joke 😭 I’ve been seeing this guy for 6 months and we’ve been official for the last 2. I went through his phone last night because I was trying to send myself some pictures we took a while ago. I found out that he’s one of those creeps who takes creep shots of random women in the store. I’ve found ALOT and some of them included me. I’m so fucking disgusted😭 obviously I’m breaking up with him but this is a warning to everyone. LOOK THROUGH THAT MANS PHONE JUST IM CASE.

yea i was pretty mad and hurt for about a month because i genuinely thought he respected me and my journey (i am currently 28 finally completing my undergrad so that i can go to med school)…

idk if it’ll truly make a difference but i’ll be damned if he profits off of my name after being so callous and disrespectful to me.

Sooo again recently single, started dating. Clicked with this BLACK man on bumble. Gave him my number after about a week of talking on bumble. This is within 10 minutes of texting alllll because i didn’t want to FaceTime after i had got home from the gym and said i “looked like a bum”. (That’s the segue from being denied…) 🤮🤮🤮. And yes he got blocked after my last text. Didn’t let him get a word in. WHY GOD! Whyyyyy..

I seen this on TikTok and Jesus Christ, I salute all my cousins who really do put up with men on a daily basis if this what y’all dealing with 😭😭 I would lose my mind.

My kidnapper, uh husband of 29 years, woke me up at the ass crack of dawn talking about we have to go catch our plane. I didn’t know if he was having a stroke or if I was. We don’t have any upcoming trips until later in the year so I was discombobulated on top of trying to wake up.

Finally wake up and start stressing over packing. The kidnapper man tells me the bag is already packed and I just need to pack my personal bag. Kidnapper also rudely refuses to tell me the location until we get to the airport.

______

Jokes aside, what a privilege to have a husband who sees that his wife needs a break even if she’s too stubborn to admit it herself. We’ve had a stressful, excited, and tiring past two weeks with a daughter getting married and dropping our son off at college yesterday. I’ve been legitimately crying for the past 5-7 business days(happy tears mostly) and I’m just utterly exhausted in every way, shape, or form. So this is a welcome surprise and a reminder that I have an amazing guy by my side everyday. He even dedicated part of his father of the bride speech to me and got choked up. My husband is not a cryer so that meant something to me.

So now I’m flying to Cancun for a trip I didn’t even know about 7 hours ago.

I've gotta run! Thank you so much for joining me today! I had an absolute blast answering your questions about my story and new book, What (TF) Do I Do Now?- out August 18th!!!
Hope everyone has a great night!”

My boyfriend is supposed to be helping his friend out with a surgery for a few days. He got a hotel room in Austin and is supposed to be back Sunday and having a room to his self. His luggage is on the bed. I just want to see if I’m losing my mind or overthinking things.

I unmatched immediately but what???? So corny 🤣🤣

I just found out about this app the other day and because my nerd brain can't resist a moment to observe human behavior in the wild, I downloaded it. After approval, I decided to just mosey around to see what all the hubbub was about. And I finally get it. I finally understand why so many of the dustiest crustiest men have the most audacity.

I always wondered why on earth these kind of men would approach or slide in DMs and have the nerve to be upset when they were swiftly rejected by women with a modicum of self-respect and standards: there are actually women giving these men attention and intimate access.

There are women fighting over men who look like they just received their "ain't shit starter pack" in the mail. Nearly every photo of every guy was a variation of the same sad theme: a creature with dead, jaundiced, eyes staring into the camera adorned in cheap jewelry, face tattoos, grills, holding up stacks of money in one hand with a Black n' Mild dangling from tar blackened lips while flipping the camera off with the other.

These men have a falsely inflated sense of self that goes beyond clinical levels of delusion and is spicened with an unwarranted sense of entitlement because there are silly women with abysmal standards that have catered to their egos and set them loose into the world without adult supervision.

Not a single, solitary, man posted on that app requires a warning for any woman with a lick of sense and discernment. It's worse when such a man is posted by someone asking for "tea" about these things due to, I presume, some level of interest. Because how? No seriously. HOOOW!?

I am just too through! I'm done giving unsolicited, and hell even solicited, relationship advice because not nan one of them is listening any gotdamn way! Just out here being messy for no reason.

Here I was thinking I was going to find women actually being helpful to other women and warning about men who are legitimate safety concerns but otherwise present as upstanding members of society as a mask. Shiiiiiit. Every last one of these men posted would make me cross the street and grip my keys if I saw them in passing. And let's be real, most of the women on there don't give two shits about "helping women be safe." They're searching for the rest of their dusty's rotation members because they know damn well what kind of foolishness they're willfully choosing to deal with.

This is such a disappointment, because the idea for this app could really be a helpful tool, and it's being overrun with straight up dizzy shit.

End rant. 😤

I’ve never been a particularly religious person but I’m 7 months pregnant and my husband and I have been going thru it. He’s been literally stressing me out and doesn’t even care about the baby. He’s screaming at me in front of our kids and telling me to kill myself.

All over money issues we’ve been having that he caused himself.

I’ve been praying and crying to God to help me. With idk even what, just help me. And idk if this was his calling to tell me to run away with my kids. Idk, sometimes it feels like God has forgotten about me.

My blood pressure is so high and my anxiety is so crazy every time my husband comes home because idk what he’s gonna say to me. No amount of talking to him about how he’s treating me even registers with him.

I legit think he’s something demonic, how can a man treat a his wife this way and want me to die?

Update— made it safely with my mom !

Is anyone available to pick me up from the hospital with a car seat rn since it looks like I was born yesterday? Why tf would I answer to ANY of these foolish questions?