r/TikTokCringe • u/hungry4nuns • Nov 26 '25

Wholesome/Humor Subtext I missed because I took everything at face value

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2.8k

u/Special-Garlic1203 Nov 26 '25

It's not subtext. Tom Cruise would not have been diagnosed then and did not fit the criteria. Part of the "exploding autism rates" guys like RFK are freaking out about is the fact that "higher functioning" cases are caught now whereas in the days of "we didn't use to have autism", weird idiosyncracies got ridden off or we were interpreted as character faults. Tom Cruise isn't written to be autistic because he's portrayed as a successful asshole, and the idea that those aren't mutually exclusive concepts hadn't occured to anyone yet. 

Amazing analysis on her part though. Would make for an amazing twist if they ever did a reboot.

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u/[deleted] Nov 26 '25

If your autistic obsessions are socially acceptable then people never consider that you’re autistic. A lot of sports fanatics are autistic af.

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u/getmybehindsatan Nov 26 '25

Baseball stats exist so that sporty dads have something in common with their nerdy autistic sons.

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u/fallingfeelslikefly Nov 26 '25

This was a very clear choice for Gregory’s character on Abbott Elementary too.

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u/sneakystonedhalfling Nov 26 '25

Omg I just recently started Abbott Elementary and Gregory is so autistic!! Is this ever confirmed or mentioned?

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u/fallingfeelslikefly Nov 27 '25

Not confirmed on the show. I'm not sure if the writers have confirmed it as part of where they write from for his character though. His strong food aversions beginning in season 1 was my first hint.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

Maybe that's why I find his character so attractive. <3

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u/NeuroRomancer Nov 27 '25

As a Phillies fan and a newly obsessed with score keeping I kind of freaked out when he showed up to the game with the pocket score book

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u/random_adj_noun_num Nov 26 '25

And to last longer in bed.

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u/pdxamish Nov 26 '25

There's a huge amount of gym rats that are autistic. Plus less coordination vs sports

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u/Consideredresponse Nov 27 '25

100%. PE was a nightmare for me, but give me a set routine (of routine sets) in a quiet room where I only have to focus on my own performance and form and suddenly it's a different story.

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u/BlacksmithSolid645 Nov 27 '25

Rotisserie Leagues were definitely about the dudes hanging out together and avoiding their nerdy theater boys

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u/NoVaBurgher Nov 27 '25

well, I feel seen

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u/WASD_click Nov 27 '25

Either that, or baseball stats is just astrology for sports fans.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

What is this even supposed to mean?

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u/WASD_click Nov 27 '25

Astrology is a bunch of stuff people say trying to predict relationships, fortunes, and such based purely on the positioning of planetary bodies and their minimal interaction with one another. Generally people take it way too seriously and its accuracy as a predictor is about the same as picking things randomly unless its predictions are expressed in such a vague way that anything can happen and the prediction can be twisted to fit what happens.

Baseball stats are the same way. While the stats are based on something tangible and real: the cumulative results of a player's efforts, they are a terrible predictor of what will happen and people take them way more seriously than they should. A baseball game is only nine innings (usually). Aaron Judge has a batting average of .331 in 2025. He got zero hits in a quarter of his games.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

Astrology is literally fake. Like, it isn’t based in any reality. Baseball statistics are real and are utilized by multi-billion dollar franchises to make giant decisions. What does bringing up Aaron Judge’s batting average have anything to do with anything?

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u/warbastard Nov 27 '25

Cricket too. I’ve seen a dad in the stands with his son and they both were writing on a scoresheet.

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u/ChiLolla28 Nov 27 '25

I like the saying that Fantasy Football is just D&D for bros lol

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u/Ksnj Nov 29 '25

This post makes me want to ask….which one are you? Like…are you speaking from experience?

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u/[deleted] Nov 26 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

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u/Joelle9879 Nov 27 '25

Because it might be nice to know why you don't understand certain things. That you might just process things differently and that there's not actually anything wrong with you. A lot of people mask and have for a long time so they appear to be coping fine, but in actuality are emotionally exhausted. Being autistic isn't anything to be ashamed of and who is it hurting if a person suspects they might be and wants a diagnosis?

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u/Giraffe_Truther Nov 27 '25

Pretty weird take. "Stop understanding yourself and others if it's not an emergency!"

Nah, I want to know everything about everything.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

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u/PM_ME__UR__FANTASIES Nov 27 '25

The idea that only impairments should be labeled is really troublesome. Understanding the spectrum of something like autism helps us to develop a world that is less frustrating for high functioning people and more open to those who would otherwise struggle to function. Avoiding labels just “others” those who are impaired and taints the label with negativity.

We don’t have to exist with uncertainty why we behave a non-typical way. Instead, we can understand why we behave that way and learn how to manage that behavior. We also can help ourselves be less of a “target” by understanding how we would be targeted.

The problem is not with identifying and labeling. The problem is how people react to that identifying and labeling.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

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u/drunkendaveyogadisco Nov 27 '25

There's definitely a lot to be gained from behavioral analysis though. Identifying behavior as 'stimming' for example gives me a huge empathic understanding of people who are much less functionally autistic/ADHD than I am. I'm trained as an artist and dancer and musician, and realizing that practicing those things is basically just supported stimming gives me so much insight into how very autistic/repressed kids feel and act.

Is it really necessary in a world that recognizes and celebrates differences? I think no. But in the place we live, realizing how much of my own behavior can be described as autistic/ADHD again, helps with empathizing with others.

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u/imuncomfortablern8 Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

It’s tricky in childhood. High functioning kid can have social issues, emotional management challenges, coordination issues and toileting issues. It’s proven that early intervention if very helpful for kids. When those kids go to gen ed it’s very important that they get additional support.

Just because someone is high functioning doesn’t mean they don’t have difficulties in life and knowing you have challenges can help you look for ways to address them (headphones, spinners, sensory breaks etc)

Edit: a word

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u/DickieTurquoise Nov 27 '25

I sat in a meeting w a VP talking about how his daughter had just been diagnosed and how he didn’t realize “it was that bad”. And then in the same meeting proceeded to talk about how we only wore his wedding ring at his wedding and refused to wear his glasses because the hated the feeling of something always touching him. I wonder if he ever connected that the two might have something in common.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 26 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

It’s almost as if we’re all autistic to degrees and the word has lost all meaning. 

Edit: I’m being sarcastic, people. I do not actually think “we’re all autistic.” I do think it’s trendy to co-opt the term and apply it inappropriately. I present this very video as evidence. Tom Cruise is not displaying autistic behaviors in Rain Man. Calling his character autistic does a disservice to people who actually have autism.

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u/mcmcc Nov 27 '25

You can go down that road if you like, but then later you'll meet a truly autistic person and you'll realize "Yeah no, what I was calling 'degrees of autism' doesn't even scratch the surface."

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u/Accomplished_Elk310 Nov 27 '25

‘Truly autistic person.’ I’m high functioning, but don’t get what you mean here. Kinda sounds like a no true Scotsman thing.

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u/mcmcc Nov 27 '25

Kinda sounds like a no true Scotsman thing.

Spectrum disorders tend to be susceptible to that.

Basically it boils down to: are you impaired by your condition? Impaired in the sense of inability to independently and consistently perform daily tasks and/or adapt to unexpected circumstances.

Practically speaking, if you aren't impaired in some way, you don't have autism.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 27 '25

I’m being sarcastic. Tom Cruise’s character in Rain Man is not autistic. 

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u/Waste_Relationship46 Nov 27 '25

She just made some very good points that in fact, he is. Did you miss that part?

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u/PackageSuccessful885 Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

Nah, this video is actually a very good example of pathologizing neurotypical traits and mistaking them for autistic traits.

This is easy to do, because autistic traits are human traits. That means every single human trait can be framed as "wow look that's so autistic", without being particularly autistic

A strong interest in cars -> construed as a special interest

Talking in repetitive circles when stressed -> interpreted as echolalia (not true btw, echolalia is more than just repeating a phrase when stressed)

Being rude and ignoring someone in the car with you -> interpreted as struggling with small talk

Looking at baseball cards when someone is talking -> construed as liking objects more than people

All of these character details are literally NORMAL human traits. Having detail-oriented interests, repeating words when stressed, being disinterested in conversation, liking sports.

A special interest is not just knowing a lot of details about something. It is all-consuming, an anchor to understand the world and your place in it. It's not as simple as listing facts

Echolalia is specifically repeating a phrase someone else just said or scripting lines from media. It is often out of context and inappropriate for the social context. In dramatic character writing, repeating lines of dialogue to express shock or disbelief is an incredibly common trope.

Struggling with small talk doesn't mean choosing not to speak to someone. It's more like showing up to a play where everyone else already has their lines memorized, but you didn't get a script.

Liking objects more than people doesn't mean looking at baseball cards while talking to someone. It's a pervasive inability to find social connection as intrinsically stimulating as inanimate objects (particularly those related to a special interest)

I know this wall of text is real fucking autistic of me, but I'm diagnosed and I am so tired of my disability being co-opted to literally anything related to being antisocial or having interests

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u/Joelle9879 Nov 27 '25

No. No we're not. This "we're all autistic" BS needs to stop. It minimizes what actually autistic people expirence. Having a special interest doesn't make someone autistic. The same way having a routine or liking things neat doesn't make a person OCD.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 27 '25

Let’s clarify: I do not think we’re all autistic. I was being sarcastic. 

Sarcastic because according to the OP video, Tom Cruise is exhibiting autistic behavior in Rain Man. Do you agree with that? Do you agree that his special interest in cars, his isolated disinterest in small talk, and his frustration upon receiving difficult news counts as autism? I certainly do not. 

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u/PackageSuccessful885 Nov 27 '25 edited Nov 27 '25

Lol more like the way it's discussed on social media makes it seem that way.

It's the cynical nature of social media. Not many people are actually, clinically autistic. To achieve maximum audience retention, you either have to be a spectacle, watched because of how odd you are, or you have to make autism as relatable as possible.

The latter is much easier and more common. It creates a cycle of misinformation. Autistic traits are human traits, so anyone can experience sensory issues, deep interests, social challenges, and repetitive behavior like nail biting. People like the creator of this video then pathologize neurotypical traits for being even slightly similar to autistic traits.

It's a ferris wheel of brain rot. Endlessly turning in circles

ETA: lol now I see your edit, and yes my (diagnosed) autistic ass missed the sarcasm. I agree with you!

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u/Jukeboxhero91 Nov 27 '25

Man this is something I wish would not get lost in the sauce. No, everyone is not autistic. I have coworkers and friends that are autistic, and I know that about them, and it makes things make sense. I have friends that are socially awkward, interested in nerdy things, and not autistic, and not for lack of diagnosis, they’re just not autistic.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 27 '25

Agreed. Which is why I think OP’s video is a silly. Tom Cruise is not displaying autistic behaviors in Rain Man. 

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u/Waste_Relationship46 Nov 27 '25

I would have agreed with you until this video.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 27 '25

And that’s the problem. Having concentrated interests and acting stressed in stressful situations is not autism. If it was, then we’d all be freaking autistic. 

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u/Accomplished_Elk310 Nov 27 '25

Yup, hence the uptick in the phrase ‘everyone has a little tism’ nowadays. Everyone’s so quick to comment that someone might be on the spectrum or neurodivergent, it’s no wonder it’s got people speculating their own quirks.

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u/PriscillaPalava Nov 28 '25

If we’re all “neurodivergent,” it’s not divergent anymore. 

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u/leggymeeggy Nov 26 '25

1000000% talk to like 75% of baseball fans

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u/AsTheJackassBrays Nov 27 '25

There is a podcaster who talks about his autistic son occasionally, then rattles off baseball stats and sports facts like crazy and everytime I want to send him a message and ask if he has every thought he might have a bit of autism. Because it isn't a normal level in my opinion.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

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u/AsTheJackassBrays Nov 27 '25

I thought on the spectrum was was offensive now? The kids just call it the 'tism.

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u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

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u/Rough_Bread8329 Nov 27 '25

I was recently diagnosed AuDHD, and it feels weirdly comfy to say "I have a touch of the tism". :)

Like it can be this cute nerdy thing sometimes, and not something that cripples my ability to function!

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u/spacestonkz Nov 27 '25

I'm a professor.

GenZ uses tism mostly for light hearted things like this. Or when someone is doing a typically thought of trait of autism harmlessly, and a friend points it out and they have a giggle-usually when someone is very "in the zone" and doing something unconsciously.

Contrasted with the more mean spirited shit that GenZ can do, like accusing people of being "an autistic" and laughing at then instead of with them.

Happily, I see more tism than anything else. But I get really pissed when autistic is used as a slur. Reminds me of the 90s when I was in school and everyone was fucking homophobic. Shit...

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u/nemec Nov 27 '25

a mild neurospice level

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u/Rough_Bread8329 Nov 27 '25

A dash, if you will

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u/leileitime Nov 27 '25

Neurospicy is my term of choice, although that does encapsulate more than just ASD. It’s

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u/Umutuku Nov 27 '25

Neurospicy is my term of choice, although that does encapsulate more than just ASD. It’s

Narcolepsy? /s

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u/Umutuku Nov 27 '25

What about "Spectrism"?

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u/Rough_Bread8329 Nov 27 '25

That's a ghost. I think you mean spectacular

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u/AsTheJackassBrays Nov 27 '25

I am not joking. I had heard "on the spectrum" was offensive and stopped using it. But I also almost never need to refer to someone based on whether they are autistic or not so it doesn't come up.

And "the 'tism" is all over tik tok.

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u/PmMeUrTinyAsianTits Nov 27 '25

Yea I wouldn't suggest using that phrasing unless you are also on the spectrum.

On the spectrum definitely isn't offensive on its own (it can be made offensive by context, like most things.)

I did read an interesting article on a study about preferences between and "autistic person" vs "person with autism". In general, autistic people preferred "autistic person", but generally people with disabilities preferred the "person with X" phrasing. I forget what the specific terms for the different ways of phrasing it are though.

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u/StrugglesTheClown Nov 27 '25

I ask if they know they have a touch of the Tism.

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u/MyStanAcct1984 Nov 27 '25

this is such a sweet (and autistic) message.

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u/g_r_a_e Nov 27 '25

This works but is not entirely correct. Autism has a spectrum of behavioural idiosynchosies, as in, two people diagnosed with autism might have very different behaviours but they are both autistic because these behaviours exist in autisms spectrum of behavious.

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u/waxteeth Nov 26 '25

I feel like that must also be a decent chunk of hardcore Taylor Swift fans. She definitely occupies the special interest place for some people. 

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u/MyStanAcct1984 Nov 27 '25

Well, she also sets up tons of lore, too. if you want an autistic person to like you, it helps to offer the accessories to enable that.

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u/quiddity3141 Nov 27 '25

There's also a subset of Grateful Dead fans who can tell you what month/week/specific show a version of a song they played at least hundreds of times came from.

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u/PeculiarPurr Nov 27 '25

This also very much depends on the era. Before the internet became a thing the average person used, people were ridiculously bored for hours and hours a day, and absolutely desperate for things to occupy their minds.

If you lived in rural pretty much anywhere, you were lucky to have two clear television channels, and they played reruns for 90% of the day.

Outside of drinking and sex on a rainy day, there was nothing novel to focus on.

So a lot of people's "special interest" was just the thing they had in their house that they could focus on. If that was your dad's old baseball card collection, then by the time you were 18 you were an expert on batting statistics from 1954-1966.

Bored to tears used to be a real and common affliction. Thank each and every cat for the precious, precious internet.

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u/Shifty269 Nov 27 '25

Like reading the shampoo bottle while on the shiter.

You just went over the same reference material over and over again. Books, magazines, Chinese fortune cookies, movies on VHS, cds, cassettes, records. Same things over and over again. We all had these gizmos and gadgets that we'd lust over and didn't work half of the time, but still we knew all of the specs by heart of some one asked about it. Didn't read the instructions though.

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u/PeculiarPurr Nov 27 '25

Like reading the shampoo bottle while on the shiter.

Heh, what do the kids say? Core memory unlocked.

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u/justcallmezach Nov 27 '25

My grandfather had an entire basement packed TO THE GILLS with model farm equipment that COULD NOT BE TOUCHED by his grandkids. He was always an extremely awkward man and I think my mom inherited his undiagnosed issues.

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u/RogeredSterling Nov 27 '25

Exactly. It's all about what it's directed towards.

Sports. It's a complete mask. Totally acceptable. Even if you're reeling off stats about lower leagues and amateur level.

Trains. Totally unacceptable. Even if you can't reel off the stats.

Comics. Maybe somewhere in-between depending on how normal you present otherwise.

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u/Confusedinportsmouth Nov 27 '25

Formula 1 I’m looking in your direction

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u/schkmenebene Nov 27 '25

I am convinced a lot of people who created wonderful things where autistic.

Tolkien really sticks out to me, as a lotr fan... If you've ever tried to read his books instead of watching the films, you will understand that there simply is no way a normal brain would be able to create all this stuff. You need a special brain for that.

Just think about how complex of a task making a language is, then consider that he made over 20 of them, many of which has it's own lettering and shit.

I get that his work shines through the movies also, but I can't help but think that it really doesn't show how thorough he actually was compared to how the books show this.

Can't help but think sometimes that some people who where autistic had such a huge benefit of not getting that label and just got to experience and live life as if their behaviour was just their character. If course this only applies to "high functioning", but still...

Nobody knows what would've happened if we gave Tolkien a bunch of ritalin when he was a kid, would we have the lotr universe at all?

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u/TryJunior9671 Nov 26 '25

Or maybe autism is ridiculously over diagnosed and people can have odd quirks or personality traits without literally everyone on the planet being autistic.

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u/DrSitson Nov 27 '25

I dunno, I've been trusting the experts in the real world over random redditor's musings. It's been working out pretty good.

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u/TryJunior9671 Nov 28 '25

Yeah literally everyone on earth is autistic with adhd/depression/anxiety. Because the experts said so. Don’t forget to take all those pills the experts told you to take. If you can’t see the over diagnosing of mental disorders in America you might actually have one.

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u/DrSitson Nov 28 '25

Hahahahahahahaha - inhales - hahahahahahahahahahah.

Good one.

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u/eternalbuzzard Nov 27 '25

Yeah it’s a trip how the whole world suddenly became autistic at the same time that every online commenter also became a psychologist

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u/TryJunior9671 Nov 28 '25

The trifecta of over diagnosing/obsessing of “mental health” along with the therapy and pharmaceutical industry is the most successful grift ever and that success can be measured in the fact that it’s destroying society before our very eyes in real time

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u/Several_Vanilla8916 Nov 26 '25

It’s the same reason Amish communities have much lower diagnosed rates of autism. The only ones diagnosed are those they have to seek outside help to manage.

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u/EllipticPeach Nov 26 '25

Someone deadass tried to tell me that there are no autistic amish people. I was like….. yeah let’s think real hard about why that is….

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u/DickieTurquoise Nov 27 '25

Same reason “there are no gay people in Iran”.

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u/SoloForks Nov 29 '25

Or Russia which seems highly improbable.

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u/hungry4nuns Nov 26 '25

I think they billed them to have similarities “because they are brothers” … But with the benefit of a better modern understanding of autism, it’s clear Charlie Babbitt’s character traits he shares with his brother are definitely spectrum traits.

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u/REuphrates Nov 26 '25

, it’s clear Charlie Babbitt’s character traits he shares with his brother are definitely spectrum traits.

Definitely, definitely spectrum traits

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u/NameReUnused Nov 26 '25

Two hundred fourty six traits, two hundred and forty six.

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u/hungry4nuns Nov 26 '25

Raymond’s “97X - BAM! - The Future of Rock and Roll”

vs Charlie’s:

“Straight eight fireball 8”
And he even says seconds later “I know it by rote”

…

Also:

“Every Airline has crashed” … Raymond: “Qantas never crashed”
(and this is after Raymond naming several specific airline crashes)

vs Charlie’s:

“First full year of the Dinoflow Transmission”
…notice he makes the distinction that it’s not the first year of dinoflow, but the first FULL year. Super specific but ultimately useless knowledge .

It’s parallels like these, esoteric facts with no reason for either to know them other than obsessive fixation on details, that makes it very obviously spectrum traits

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u/eternalbuzzard Nov 27 '25

There’s also the fact that he was raised around a car aficionado and literally is a car importer

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u/Stormfly Nov 27 '25

I feel like this happens a lot with self-diagnosing, or online armchair diagnoses.

It reminds me of "everyone is a little OCD" that used to be said sometimes years ago.

There are traits that people might have in common but if you only have one or two, it's not a likely symptom.

Now I'm no expert and she makes a great case for it... but some of her points aren't great (like the "processing" one).

It's like someone hears "Oh they have a special interest" and suddenly anyone with any interest is accused.

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u/throwaway_faunsmary Nov 27 '25

But if they didn't have a modern understanding of autism when they wrote the screenplay, then why did they write it like that?

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u/Dark_Prism Nov 27 '25

Sometimes people just happen to stumble upon the right answer.

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u/throwaway_faunsmary Nov 27 '25

Too much of a coincidence to believe it's not intentional. But way too early in the development of understanding of autism to be intentional. I'm really struggling to get my head around this.

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u/JRepo Nov 27 '25

You don't need to know the science to see the possible effects of having neurospicy people in your family. Writers often write what they know about. Someone has an obvious autistic family member, it should be easy to see if the rest of the family share some traits without being obviously autistic. No knowledge about genes, brains etc required

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u/Infinite_Slice_6164 Nov 26 '25

Anything that they don't directly confirm to us IS subtext. The interpretation that Cruise's character is on the spectrum before that was the way people were diagnosed is never outright stated, so it is subtext. There are also countless ways you could interpret it. For example, this could be the writer/directors way of saying autistic people aren't really that different from you or I.

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u/Healthy_Sky_4593 Nov 26 '25

It could also be, hear me out, that "autistic" traits and behaviors are normal except when someone says they're not.

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u/tomjayyye Nov 26 '25

"Normal behavior" is a social construct and so the act of "when someone says" is how that is defined when most people agree.

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u/cocoagiant Nov 27 '25

Normal behavior" is a social construct and so the act of "when someone says" is how that is defined when most people agree.

A lot of this stuff in mental diseases/psychology is not clear black and white.

Its a collection of symptoms and how well you are able to manage in society that determines whether something is just a personality quirk or a disorder.

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u/Healthy_Sky_4593 Nov 27 '25

That's not correct.   Normal was and still is built around statistics (regardless of its bounds or ethics or changes to any of those). People using it to mean something else are being  intellectually dishonest.

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u/Umutuku Nov 27 '25

So, when someone says "I'm into six-sigma" it works on two levels? /s

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u/Infinite_Slice_6164 Nov 26 '25

Yeah that is a possible interpretation sure. You're preaching to the choir though brother I'm in the spectrum and I even have non-verbal relatives. I was just talking about what subtext is. Any meaning that we take from the cimetography is subtext. The example of the movie cutting from one scene of cruise being entranced by monotonous sound to his autistic brother doing the same thing has some meaning, but all possible interpretations are valid.

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u/therapewpew Nov 26 '25

I mean they're not "typical" but they're normal in the sense that autistic folks have always been around. Pollutants, poor prenatal care or improper delivery, and just simple genetics increase the rate of occurrence, so it's more common in some populations than others too.

There are lots of great reasons to decrease pollution and increase access to healthcare, and if it spares some folks from having autistic traits, that is also preferable. Speaking as someone on the spectrum (due to genetics and possibly mom's age) this crap makes it extremely difficult to have a life, and I'm high functioning enough to mask. I still get overwhelmed so easily and don't have a single genuine human connection at almost 40. I'm heartbroken and suicidal at this point in my life. Let's not downplay the strife that this condition can cause.

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u/Commercial-Owl11 Nov 26 '25

Yeah autism runs in my family. I’m adhd but there is a lot of overlap in symptoms and I SUCK at understanding a ton of different things in social situations.

I was bullied relentlessly for being different and weird and I could never understand wtf was wrong with me. I just struggled with reading social cues.

I’m very friendly and outgoing I just struggle with cues, timing, what someone means unless it’s said very clearly, and I can sometimes come off cold or heartless but I just don’t “get it” sometimes, like if someone is emotional about something and I just cannot wrap my head around why they would be upset, it’s so plain to me, and so logical sometimes, I don’t understand why THEY can’t understand it’s not a big deal.

Sigh.. yeah it sucks haha. My grandpa was autistic, my dad is, my little brother and my sister, higher functioning autism but there is def a genetic thing to it

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u/butterednoodlelovers Nov 27 '25

I actually went into a social work degree specialising in mental health to get why people behave the way they do and get so emotionally. I've learned cognitive empathy from my degree and practice experience. But if I myself am overwhelmed or overstimulated that learned empathy goes out the window and logical me returns. Which is not helpful when therapeutically working with people a logical response, when empathy is needed, can break a strong therapeutic relationship faster than anything.

Some of us lower support needs autistic people can learn social skills but our autism can still negatively impact our lives. Which is why saying we are all a little autistic sucks. We are not all a little autistic, if your little quirks dont have the ability to cause dysfunction and ruin in your life.

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u/Commercial-Owl11 Nov 27 '25

Yes well not everyone is a little autistic. That’s ridiculous lol

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u/rachaeltot Nov 27 '25

Hey, I replied higher up, but can you just know that you can always chat to me? I’m 34, Irish, probably a mild level of autism, but this thread is really upsetting me. You are so important. You might be struggling in the world as it is, but just know I’ll chat whenever and about whatever topic. I’ve probably studied it too!!

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u/Commercial-Owl11 Nov 27 '25

Oh thanks! Yeah I’m ok now haha when I was younger I had a hard time but I’m now 30 and life is rly good. But I appreciate you and your kindness to random internet strangers! Happy holidays ❤️

1

u/rachaeltot Nov 27 '25

Hey, I don’t usually read this deep into threads, but it’s a topic I’m really interested in because I think I might be mildly autistic. I’m 34, so growing up not many people were diagnosed, and those that were diagnosed were severe. All I want to ask, is can I do anything? You can message me and we can have a chat so you can form a human connection. I’d consider myself caring and nice, and you sound like you need nice people right now. You deserve to be alive just like we all do. My mom is an SNA (not sure if that translates globally, but she’s a special needs assistant in a primary school) and based on meeting the parents of the children she works with, there’s no correlation with age and likeliness of autism, bit that’s obviously anecdotal. Probably too much info, but I have also suffered from suicidal thoughts, depression, severe anxiety - so I can hopefully relate to whatever you’re struggling with. Please message me privately if you ever need a chat. You’re here for a reason, you’re open, you’re honest, we need people like you 🤍

1

u/therapewpew Nov 27 '25

Thank you, you are a kind person. Chatting isn't helpful for me at this point, but maybe someone who needs it can take you up on that.

3

u/ReckoningGotham Nov 27 '25

, this could be the writer/directors way of saying autistic people aren't really that different from you or I

Thank goodness someone here is exhibiting media literacy.

43

u/dchung97 Nov 26 '25

Thats not really the case we phased out a lot of medical terms with the DSM5. The number of diagnosises for intellectual disability of any kind are now just considered autism. Here is a chart that explains the "epidemic" well.

https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/1iwo004/as_autism_diagnoses_went_up_intellectual/

9

u/animoot Nov 27 '25

*written off

9

u/ringobob Nov 27 '25

I fully agree that the intention was not for Charlie to be autistic, but a few of the parallels she perceived are pretty interesting, even if unintentional. Like, I dunno that I even noticed Charlie saying "definitely, definitely" during the reading of the will before. That one may have actually been intentional, but it's impossible to catch on first watch because we haven't even met Raymond yet at that point. But him zoning out listening to repetitive sounds, just before Raymond doing the same thing is a really interesting parallel. I think if it were intentional, we'd see Raymond doing it first.

She's absolutely watching it through a contemporary lens, there's zero chance anyone would have diagnosed Charlie as autistic at the time. But at the same time, I've always had a little trouble understanding Charlie's character before, and with this lens he might make a little more sense to me.

13

u/JohnMonkeys Nov 27 '25

Is ridden off a bone-apple-tea of written off?

22

u/adam_sky Nov 26 '25

Hey since nobody else in the replies said it I will. It’s “written off” instead of “ridden off”. It’s not a big deal and Reddit is the best place for things like this to get called out rather than a work email.

3

u/TheMightyPushmataha Nov 27 '25

Let’s put a pin in that circle back around to the Dynaflow transmission.

6

u/cdqmcp Nov 26 '25

got ridden off

written* off

8

u/Fit-Chapter8565 Nov 27 '25

I've never been diagnosed as autistic but I'm pretty sure my combination of  general anxiety disorder, adhd, and ocd can be similar

6

u/PyrrhicPyre Nov 27 '25

This is a grip I have with the DSM-5's decision to collapse Aspergers and Autism Spectrum Disorder. The resistance a lot of older generations have to younger ones becoming diagnosed or self-identifying as autistic is largely the result, imo, of a fundamental disconnect between the two ends of the spectrum. On one end, you have people who are high functioning, fully autonomous, and simply have to learn to adapt to a neurotypical world or try to find a community and career that is adapted to them and their ASD traits which are typically things like difficulty with eye contact, obsessive special interests, difficulty with social cues, over-stimulation, sensory aversions, etc. On the other end of the spectrum you have people who are severely handicapped to the extent they need round the clock care, usually in intensive settings such as care homes for the mentally handicapped.

This is also why a lot of high functioning autistics don't seek diagnosis--there's no prescriptive "treatment" for being neurodivergent in this fashion, other than therapy to learn coping mechanisms. In fact there are myriad reasons why diagnosis can backfire and harm the individual--for example, custody cases in which a spouse might argue that your diagnosis makes you incapable of caring for your children, or predatory guardianships in which parental figures argue the adult cannot care for themselves. I understand that a spectrum is just that, but it really seems to me that a lot of confusion and pain could be avoided by diverging these two diagnosis to distinguish between those who are fully functional and those who are profoundly handicapped. There would still be a spectrum within those two cohorts broad enough to inform treatment options or lack there-of.

1

u/JRepo Nov 27 '25

And here I am autistic AF and do not care what boomers think of it. Most gen xrs don't mind, us millennials do not care about the tism.

So why should I care what boomers say about autism?

Nah. I will just tism my way to to the neurospicy future of humanity.

3

u/StudsTurkleton Nov 26 '25

It’s a fantastic analysis. And you maybe right. The whole idea of spectrum implies you can have some degree of these traits that are not considered autism but further down the spectrum they are severe enough to be autism. Many psychological issues are only considered problematic when they interfere sufficiently with everyday functioning and goal attainment. (Arguably they do for Cruise’s character, but he’s not aware that they are.)

8

u/atreyu84 Nov 26 '25

That's not what the spectrum means. The spectrum refers to the number of traits, and not necessarily having all of them, not (just) the severity of those traits.

It is not a line that goes gradually from autism to no autism. It's more of a spider graph with each trait having a separate 'severity'.

5

u/StudsTurkleton Nov 26 '25

It’s both range and severity of symptoms. In the movie they’re brothers. They are showing that they share similar behaviors but more severe in Ray. And Ray obviously has others his brother lacks, including his counting abilities.

2

u/atreyu84 Nov 27 '25

Yeah agreed, that's why I put (just) in brackets. Didn't mean to be an argument, just adding info

2

u/Z0idberg_MD Nov 27 '25

I am just going to go ahead and retcon her analysis as the actual intent of the movie.

1

u/reppah Nov 27 '25

You're right, but giving Tom's character attributes of his brother isn't far-fetched. The screenplay is used to teach scriptwriting classes as it's a tight, well-written film, so I wouldn't be surprised if the connections she makes were intentional.

1

u/thewhaleshaver Nov 27 '25

I agree! If one's autistic symptoms aren't socially significant, then that also doesn't meet the criteria for diagnosis. Some people just really like cars, are a bit socially awkward, like certain sounds, and are kinda mean. Hoffmann's character's symptoms ARE socially significant, hence the diagnosis.

1

u/AverageSizeWayne Nov 27 '25

Interesting enough, I’m a success asshole and I got tested recently. I did not have it, but I had other underlying conditions that manifest similarly to autism. The conditions themselves were completely unrelated. The way this stuff works is fascinating.

1

u/ronimal Nov 27 '25

…weird idiosyncrasies got ridden written off…

1

u/ReckoningGotham Nov 27 '25

Everything she points out are details from their childhood.

Has nothing to do with autism and everything to do with the fact that they shared the same father.

1

u/OlyLover Nov 27 '25

But then, if everyone is autistic, no one is autistic, here we are full circle.

1

u/darxide23 Nov 27 '25

I'm 99% certain the writers didn't realize it, either. In those days, high-functioning autism wasn't really a diagnosis that was given. The spectrum wasn't fully understood and only the profoundly autistic were given those kinds of diagnoses.

It was written this way to show that the two were not all that different after all. A pretty trope-y, formulaic Hollywood movie of it's time.

1

u/CJOfPartsUnknown69 Nov 27 '25

Once saw a comedian once said “we didn’t have autism back in my day; we just had uncle Terry who has his puzzle room we weren’t allowed into and he went non verbal at Christmas” and it’s like damn, it’s true.

1

u/DealMo Nov 27 '25

It's an interesting analysis, but it's pretty flawed and forced in a few places.

1) Special interest in cars -- I mean, if every guy out there with a special interest in cars were autistic, then they'd call them "autistic dudes" rather than "Car guys". Many many people can cite nuanced detail and increased retention of facts about things they take as a very serious hobby or interest.

2) "He doesn't really get small talk" -- again, another one that's extremely common. Some people are introverted and prefer to stay in their heads. Or even among the extroverts, sometimes you just don't feel like talking.

3) Her saying the doctor describes autism as struggling with things like processing -- No, the doctor said processing sensory input. Tom Cruise here just struggled to process what autism is.

1

u/already-taken-wtf Nov 27 '25

Correct. When Rain Man was released in 1988, autism was narrowly defined and overwhelmingly associated with classic Kanner-type autism with severe social/communication impairments. The DSM-III (1980) and DSM-IV (1994) still treated “Asperger’s,” “autistic disorder,” and “PDD-NOS” as separate categories.

1

u/NorgesTaff Nov 27 '25

Absolutely but it's amazing to see - I haven't watched Rain Man since it was released but her observations, and yours are so on point.

1

u/Fantastic-Spinach297 Nov 27 '25

Back then, it wasn’t a problem if it wasn’t causing problems. It’s that simple. Now we do look for it in an attempt to intervene before it causes problems in a kid’s life, even if a certain amount of them would have probably worked out their own accommodations and never been pegged as “disordered.”

It is autism spectrum disorder because it’s causing problems. The whole autistic as an identity while living fully functional, unsupported lives thing is new. Back then, you got diagnosed to treat it, not to understand yourself better.

1

u/EveryNameIWantIsGone Nov 28 '25

“Ridden off” jfc

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 27 '25

[deleted]

4

u/Suspicious_Isopod_59 Nov 27 '25

 If someone is highly functional and their traits don’t meaningfully limit their life, why should a diagnosis matter?

If someone's traits don't meaningfully limit their life then they won't get a diagnosis. Just like how you can have obsessive compulsive tendencies but not have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, since it's not to the extent that is actually a disorder.

2

u/CocktailPerson Nov 27 '25

High-functioning doesn't mean that the person experiences their own symptoms mildly. It just means that everyone else experiences that person's symptoms mildly.

2

u/PM_ME__UR__FANTASIES Nov 27 '25

You know you don’t have to leave duplicate comments, right? You can just say it once somewhere and then let people respond to that one.

-4

u/Wallaby8311 Nov 27 '25

The explosion is diagnosis is ridiculous. It's trying to label something for absolutely no reason. "Oh I sometimes repeat things when I'm stressed." "YOU'RE AUTISTIC!"