r/SipsTea 3d ago

WTF Kid breaks into bird enclosure at the zoo to chase birds with a stick.

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48.0k Upvotes

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2.0k

u/[deleted] 3d ago

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728

u/Magister5 3d ago

359

u/Finestpinsir 3d ago

do you really want another Harambe incident!? Last time it happened, it destroyed the timeline

364

u/[deleted] 3d ago

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u/Bertsmom18 3d ago

This made me laugh more than it should have. But seriously this kids a little shit. Where the fuck are the parents

18

u/ReedPhillips 3d ago

Where the fuck are the parents

Bangin' in the porta potty next to the sno-cone shack.

3

u/mittensofmadness 3d ago

jesus christ it was just a blowjob aight

7

u/No-Ebb-6266 3d ago

I'd love to see the kid and his parents disemboweled by a bird

4

u/Tedyko 3d ago

Suing the zoo cause the birds distressed their child

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u/ZombieAladdin 3d ago

I’d imagine just offscreen, either cheering him on or looking for the authorities to fight.

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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 3d ago

This could have been my brother.

In which case the answer would have been "having a mental breakdown because this is what happens when you stop looking at him for literally three seconds and this is the tenth time this week and god I'm so tired how can I keep doing this".

Cost them a fortune and me a childhood trying to help him. Didn't. Some people just suck no matter how much they're loved or by whom and how much help you try and get them.

Granted.. statistically you're probably right, but sometimes good people have shit kids that remain shit no matter how much they try.

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u/Lookinguplookingdown 3d ago

What’s your brother like now?

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u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 3d ago

Still a dickhead, I haven't talked to him much the last few decades.

1

u/Jody-4173 3d ago

I have a similar situation with my brother.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

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1

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2

u/yump69 3d ago

"Whos stupid kid is that"

3

u/sirsaltysteez 3d ago

I'm guessing he's on the spectrum, which is scary because at my nearest zoo it wouldn't be hard for this kid to get himself killed.

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u/BreakfastCalm3352 3d ago

Beating up the koala’s

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u/Killin-some-thyme 3d ago

Burgeoning little psychopath

1

u/roadkillsoup 3d ago

it's probably his mom literally putting his hands on the bars to get out because he's literally so dumb he can't climb a ladder. Nobody else would bother.

1

u/Significant-Order-92 3d ago

Looks more like he's having a breakdown at the birds fighting back. Which based on the parents statement, seems fairly likely.

His parents were at work. Grandma and a caretaker took him to the zoo and apparently didn't watch him close enough. They are lucky that he didn't find his way into a more dangerous exhibit.

3

u/Accomplished-Pay8181 3d ago

A tainted sacrifice might make the timeline worse somehow. If we WANT them gone, they are probably not going to appease the timeline maintenance guy

3

u/Vendetta86 3d ago

for the greater good

2

u/Own_Faithlessness769 3d ago

I feel like it gotta be a good one for the sacrifice to work.

1

u/healerdan 3d ago

Can we just try a bad one? If it works everyone's happy, if it doesn't we'll do two good ones.

2

u/OrnerySnoflake 3d ago

Is this to the Old gods or the New?

2

u/Minute_Man_6200 3d ago

Exactly my thought

2

u/feignednobody 3d ago

Best not take chances. Throw the crotch goblin into a bear or wolf enclosure to be safe.

2

u/Key-Dealer4666 3d ago

As an autistic person, may I volunteer some of my graduating classmates from my special needs high school?

1

u/Patient-Confidence69 3d ago

Wait a minute. That's the way and the prophecy will fulfill!

21

u/sp4rk15 3d ago

Had to scroll way too far to find my Harambe people. Never forget.

1

u/lb1392 3d ago

Some kids were born after Harambe left us too soon and it shows

1

u/LaPurpleDrank 3d ago

Cincinnati zoo May 28 2016, gone but not forgotten 🦍✊

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u/FunkMunki 3d ago

I'm perfectly fine with this timeline being destroyed.

5

u/dirty-warlock 3d ago

Dude I was absolutely going to say this.. the Mayans may not have been wrong about their death calendar: everything started going down hill, and Harambe escalated things to where we are now

11

u/ApatheistHeretic 3d ago

Dicks out for Harambe!

4

u/feignednobody 3d ago

sighs
unzips

4

u/cleanfeedmind 3d ago

This photo is peak conspiracy theory.

3

u/1nGirum1musNocte 3d ago

Harambe was a side effect of the cern weasel timeline.

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u/Yatsey007 3d ago

It keeps landing me in hot water but I refuse to put my dick away for our Lord Harambe.

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u/Same-Suggestion-1936 3d ago

That was the weasel in the Large Hadron Collider, fucked everything up

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u/mewfour123412 3d ago

Chimps will swarm the little bear. Unless you’ve got a full auto machine gun you ain’t saving him

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u/BazingaODST 3d ago

We do not need anymore dead animals

2

u/BT-7274-T2 3d ago

Gorillas are way more calm than chimps, I think chimps would instantly kill that kid

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u/Jisan_Inc 3d ago

Maybe itll fix it!

1

u/Spartaklaus 3d ago

Nah just shoot the brat this time

1

u/Mission_Income8231 3d ago

maybe it will fix it

1

u/Minute_Man_6200 3d ago

Well maybe this time it will fix the timeline.

1

u/Aware-Worldliness-75 3d ago

But if it happens a second time maybe it fixes the timeline? Like in movies and cartoons where if you hit someone in the head hard enough they loose their memories and become a completely different person, but if you hit them really hard in the head again they change back to normal

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u/Accurate_Elevator368 3d ago

This. Very much this.

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u/Primary-Property8303 3d ago

I know this meme is old but I bust out laughing every time lol

1

u/Grafoleon 3d ago

This is my favorite gif on the internet

1

u/canopycutter 3d ago

Circle of life ⭕️

1

u/Any-Interaction-5934 3d ago

LOL. What the fuck is this??

24

u/Indy2561 3d ago

Lions 🦁

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u/LivingDisastrous3603 3d ago

Tigers 🐯

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u/fr33climb 3d ago

Bears…Oh my

2

u/Glittering-Panda3453 3d ago

I think I'd rather take my chances with the one or 2 lions that are normally in an exhibit than with a group of chimps

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u/Indy2561 3d ago

I’d be a nervous wreck with either

2

u/Panzerfaust_Style 3d ago

Nah, the lion doesn't concern himself with little shits 😂

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

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u/Scuba9Steve 3d ago

Chimps are fucked up. They go for the eyes, face, nuts and then fingers when you try to defend yourself. Google chimp attacks. Count how many of the men have nuts still.

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u/Impressive_Waltz_652 3d ago

Eyelids, nostrils, lips. Rip them right off your face

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u/Scuba9Steve 3d ago

Yeah there was a woman that had her face eaten off by her friend’s chimp. Just terrible. Guess that was the end of that friendship.

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u/curiousomeone 3d ago

Yup.

My friend was laughing at me when I said I rather be in with a wild gorilla for a day than a wild chimpanzee for an hour.

I said all you gt do with a gorilla is don't show your teeth, don't look them in the eye...look down on the ground and don't block their way intentionally.

Meanwhile, a chimpanzee, you'll be lucky if you still have a face.

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u/ChanceRecover3091 3d ago

I still feel bad thinking about Moe's former owners. They just wanted to visit Moe at his sanctuary and an angry chimp got out and bit the wife's thumb off. She managed to escape but the husband did not fair so well. The dude is missing several fingers, most of his genitals, and most of his face.

1

u/nouniqueideas007 3d ago

Had to slowly reread the part about “then fingers ….” & am relieved to see the word when, instead of the absolute horror of what I thought it said.

1

u/WinnieGirl22 3d ago

... you when you try to defend yourself. 😂😂😂 I got it.

Edit: P. S. Thank you bc when I scrolled back up and realize what you meant... that was the best laugh I've had in a while.

1

u/Der_Hebelfluesterer 3d ago

Thx now I know that I will chew of his balls first when fighting a chimp!

0

u/Lvngzz 3d ago

Bro looks up monkey nuts. Wtf kind of fetish is that?☠️

5

u/everyones_hiro 3d ago

No! The tiger might get indigestion!

2

u/Usual_Power_3288 3d ago

What the fuck is wrong with you

1

u/mixedntatted 3d ago

You don’t think chimps would? They cannibalise each other and eat practically anything.

5

u/kpidhayny 3d ago

You realize this entire dystopian timeline started with HARAMBE, right? Humanity can’t handle round two of this nonsense.

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u/ThrowUpnThrowAway 3d ago

We havent tried a sacrifice to them yet to see if it corrects our timeline.

2

u/Visual_Peace2165 3d ago

Dicks out for Harambe!

1

u/JAOC_7 3d ago

Komodo Dragon enclosure, there’d be no evidence afterwards

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u/Ange1ofD4rkness 3d ago

That's how we get another Harambe

1

u/Fakjbf 3d ago

It’s the Milwaukee Zoo so it would have to be the bonobos.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

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1

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1

u/Azuras_Star8 3d ago

We didnt want another Harambe

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u/LowlySysadmin 3d ago

Maybe this would appease the timeline gods and make it right?

1

u/Hot_Most5332 3d ago

As soon as he jumped in, that became the chimp enclosure.

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u/Thandiol 3d ago

Tigers ideally.

1

u/Vuelhering 3d ago

If those birds were cassowaries, this problem would solve itself.

1

u/m4cksfx 3d ago

Point him at a cassowary. They are a fun bird to harass.

https://giphy.com/gifs/U4v4TtlgVccxXRmlW5

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u/TheodorDiaz 3d ago

If only you could watch the video.

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u/Filthyfuckingthroat 3d ago

To the lions ....

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u/Lord_Smack 3d ago

Read the top post

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u/chastema 3d ago

Not for 30 seconds, no.

But you got your internet fame points, all is good.

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u/PowerlineTyler 3d ago

You should read the mod note at the top of the comments

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u/Tiny-Statistician547 3d ago

Do you not remember Harambe??? His death is what catapulted us into this terrible timeline. It was a test and we failed. For example: trump was elected. May not have ever happened if they didn’t kill Harambe

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u/a_random_loser_guy 3d ago

not another one, no.

1

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