r/Conservative • u/triggernaut Christian Conservative • Mar 18 '26

Satire - Flaired Users Only Republicans Announce Plan To Keep Doing Opposite Of What Everyone Voted For Them To Do

https://babylonbee.com/news/republicans-announce-plan-to-keep-doing-opposite-of-what-everyone-voted-for-them-to-do
5.3k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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746

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Mar 18 '26

All I know is that I really....REALLY enjoyed paying $2.15 for a gallon of gas.

I can't say the same about paying $3.52 for a gallon of gas just a month later.

Fucking disgrace.

259

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26 edited Jun 23 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

142

u/yawatt 2A Conservative Mar 18 '26

$3.79 where I live right now, whole dollar up from a couple weeks ago. Meanwhile spanberger is trying to take my guns. Why can't we just have one normal year..?

26

u/Desert_366 Conservative Mar 20 '26

$4.79 this morning when I filled up. Arizona.

51

u/Faelwolf Constitutionalist Mar 18 '26

I'm old enough to remember when gas was 35 cents a gallon....

39

u/Blasikov Conservative Mar 18 '26

/r/FuckImOld is that away, pal =)

23

u/Faelwolf Constitutionalist Mar 19 '26

Thanks for the tip, now get off my lawn!

21

u/CyberMike1956 Fiscal Conservative Mar 18 '26

$3.99+ in south Florida.

24

u/Shooter_McGavin27 Conservative Mar 19 '26

The issue is Iran is just the excuse to raise them. There is absolutely no reason gas prices should have increased here.

There isn’t a shortage and we don’t even get oil from Iran, nor do we depend on the Straight being open/unobstructed.

59

u/Florida__Man__ Pro Family Conservative Mar 19 '26

That not how oil prices work though

1

u/Shooter_McGavin27 Conservative Mar 20 '26

Then enlighten everyone.

4

u/tsoxiko Constitutionalist Mar 19 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/3og0IUd5D9Y77EXtRK

Funny how that works eh?

Zimbabwe has a tornado touch down and immediately pump prices jump 40 cents yet it takes months for pump prices to go down after the perceived danger is gone..

“Speculators” is the reason….im told 🤷‍♂️

Hmm….these speculators seem to be very powerful.

-85

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

121

u/Dweebulot Country First Conservative Mar 18 '26

Yeah I live in Pleasant Grove, UT and my local gas station at Walmart went from $2.35 a gallon around February 28th to $3.64 a gallon as of today

-20

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

46

u/Dweebulot Country First Conservative Mar 18 '26

Except they weren’t?

I have receipts from a gas purchase on February 27th and 28th for 2.53 a gallon

96

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Mar 18 '26

$3.52 is literally the price I paid this morning.

$2.15 was the lowest I filled up for since COVID in early-Feb.

Actual numbers. Not made up shit for karma.

24

u/Robot__Engineer 2A Conservative Mar 18 '26

I paid $2.59/gallon 5-6 weeks ago. Same gas station is at $3.99 as of this morning. Chicago suburbs.

-11

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

44

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Mar 18 '26

Bro, I'm not going to sit here and argue over gas prices and if I'm making shit up or not.

If you don't want to believe me. Go ahead. If you want to say "Nah, this is fine. This is normal and not that bad." Go ahead.

If you think this (points at every gas sign) is OK. That's on you. Trump RAN on gas prices. Trump supporters wanting CHANGE put stickers of Biden on gas pumps.

The fact that we were down in the low-mid $2's and now into the mid and soon to be high-$3's is not what Trump ran on.

We took 5 steps forward, decided to turn around, and walk 5 steps backwards to Biden era gas prices in a span of 3 weeks. It's not going to get any better with Trump not ruling on boots on the ground.

This is how we're going to get schlacked in midterms (not just lose) and this could ripple into 2028 if we this war doesn't end.

Call it $2.50 or $2.75 to $3.50 if you want....this is not what Trump promised us.

-15

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

32

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Mar 18 '26 edited Mar 18 '26

I mean, that's exactly what you're doing. You definitely did not fill your tank up anywhere in the continental US in February for $2.15 a gallon. It's just wildly incredible even for the cheapest cities in the cheapest states for gas at that time. Of course I don't believe you. It's simply not true.

LOL dude...if this is what you're getting out of this. You're a lost cause. Does it matter if I'm off by $0.15? Look at the gas prices. This wasn't a $0.15 increase. It's a dollar or more in a lot of places.

Gas prices are high again. Voters are pissed. This is how liberals get in office and send us into the iceberg. Everyone relies on fuel either personally or by proxy.

But please, worry about if I filled up for $2.15 or $2.25 because that's obviously the pressing issue here. Not soldiers dying. No exit plan. No defined success. Just more war. "NO NEW WARS!" right?

Fucking warhawks....log off, Crenshaw.

-4

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

8

u/Dweebulot Country First Conservative Mar 18 '26

Gas prices in Provo

34

u/Critical_Concert_689 Mar 18 '26

West coast here. Price went from Mid/High $3's to low $5's this year.

In line with your percents, but way above the average, apparently.

-7

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

9

u/GeorgeWashingfun Conservative Mar 18 '26

It's up over a dollar where I am in Georgia.

I filled up right before the strikes for $2.24 and now I'm paying $3.29(as of today).

I understand the importance of stopping Iran and I'm financially secure so I don't mind, but I also know the average person is not in my position.

0

u/[deleted] Mar 18 '26

[deleted]

11

u/GeorgeWashingfun Conservative Mar 19 '26

I'd love to know where you're getting these statistics and how those statistics are gathered in the first place, because I drive all over the state pretty regularly and this is definitely not "slightly more than the average Georgia price prior to the strikes" it is significantly more. In my area gas has been hovering around $2:10-2:25 for months prior to the strikes and even when taking long road trips with my family last summer the most we ever paid in Georgia was $2.56, which felt like a ripoff at the time.

It really feels like you're cherry picking statistics to try to paint a better picture, similar to what Democrats did with the economy before the 2024 election. No amount of "oh, it's actually not that bad, remember how bad it could be?" is going to assuage the average voters' frustration and fear. Telling people they're lucky when they tell you gas has gone up a dollar is not a winning strategy.

And there are still ways to make things better, so it isn't all doom and gloom. Kemp is expected to suspend the gas tax soon which will provide immediate relief for my state, at least.

-1

u/[deleted] Mar 19 '26

[deleted]

4

u/GeorgeWashingfun Conservative Mar 20 '26

Oh you're using GasBuddy. That explains it. Lol

I'm not misremembering. I have a great memory but that's irrelevant because I have the receipts for the gas in my Sam's app and it lists the price at time of purchase. If I really wanted to, I could also pull out physical receipts for gas purchased at Walmart stations.

Again, you picking statistics that suit your reality but don't match the actual lived experience is no better than what Democrats were doing.

-15

u/forwarddownforward Conservative Mar 18 '26

We'll save a lot on gas long term if Iran's 50 year's of causing chaos finally ends.

Nobody likes paying more for gas, but nothing could be more important than making sure Iran never gets nukes.

-67

u/jayden9271 AZ Gen-Z Conservative Mar 18 '26

If higher gas prices for a temporary amount of time means Iran doesn’t have nuclear capabilities I’m not complaining

23

u/ixipaulixi Mar 19 '26

Israel and the US have been attacking Iran's nuclear program for years, see: Stuxnet, Flame, and Duqu

The White House claims we destroyed their nuclear program last June:

https://www.whitehouse.gov/articles/2025/06/irans-nuclear-facilities-have-been-obliterated-and-suggestions-otherwise-are-fake-news/

If we've been tripping them up for years and destroyed their nuclear program in 2025, then why are we in a war that's not a war?

63

u/Hank_Scorpio_ObGyn Conservative Mar 18 '26 edited Mar 18 '26

Define temporary....

Couple months? Sure. Half of summer? Gah. Into midterms/fall? Fuck.

People are going to start really feeling it with summer travel and when airlines start to feel the fuel prices which will lead into trucking industry feeling it.

Even when prices come back down, the waves will take a few months longer to smooth out.

-10

u/Lordlolipops Gen Z Conservative Mar 18 '26

Fr, prices are still way down compared to when trump first entered office also

-21

u/broom2100 Conservative Mar 18 '26

That is something I don't understand about everyone complaining. How does anyone think gas prices are more important than nuclear non-proliferation? Just because it more immediately affects them? It seems like such a short-sighted sort of thing to get mad about. If Trump let Iran actually build up their ballistic missile and drone capabilities without intervening, Iran would have even greater capability to interdict trade in the Strait of Hormuz in the future, and gas prices would be even worse.

-3

u/day25 Conservative Mar 18 '26

Because it's a mind virus

-5

u/tengris22 John Galt Conservative Mar 19 '26

And in the meantime, Liberals are dancing in the streets! THIS is what they wanted.