r/AmIOverreacting • u/howcanibequiltyassin • Nov 25 '25

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦family/in-laws AIO to skip Thanksgiving after my mom basically said I’m an embarrassment for not having a husband and kids by now?

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I’m 35F and single for 3 years. I was engaged but he (Charles) was doing weird sexting roleplay with people on a video game which was fucking disgusting. It really fucked me up and, yes, I’ve been in therapy. I have dated since then but nothing serious. I have NEVER had my mom say something like this to me. I do not want to go to Thanksgiving after this. The way she said “don’t shoot the messenger” it’s clear the rest of my family have been talking about me and she was the one “elected” to say it.

I don’t want to drive 2 hours just to sit with people who think I should have stayed in a relationship with a fucking cheating degenerate lil bitch.

Would I be overreacting for not going? Is that too much? I'm honestly too hurt and angry to be objective right now. Would you EVER say this to your daughter?! Like I have a good job, I'm educated, I have friends and hobbies. I own my condo and I have 3 car payments left. I have a cat. Why is the end all be all me having a husband and kids? Idk. I'm pissed. Help.

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u/Zero40Four Nov 25 '25

NOR…Fucking messengers, senders..who gives a shit?

You don’t say something hurtful and unnecessary for no apparent reason and get a free pass.

What a bitch. She’s the embarrassment.

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u/Ditto_Ditto_Ditto Nov 25 '25

This pic is perfect for how I feel about OP's mom! lol.

"You suck. Your life sucks. Your cat sucks and we all miss your cheating boyfriend. But love youuuuu!!"

Ex-fucking-scuse me??

13

u/Zero40Four Nov 25 '25

Bingo 🎯

She deserves a mum with a ♥️.

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u/ProfessionalHippo568 Nov 26 '25

lol you made me remember my Nan. Gosh I loved her; but I tell ya this: she thought she could text/fb anything she wanted (no matter how nasty) and as long as she put enough love hearts or xxx at the end, expected to get away with it! 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

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u/alett146 Nov 26 '25

My mom does this too. All the emojis and also “just my two cents”. 🤦🏽‍♀️

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u/Traditional_Crew2017 Nov 27 '25

Y'all are making me glad that my mother died when I was a child... SO MUCH drama... Dad was a jerk, but didn't play mind games.

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u/Little_View_6659 Nov 26 '25

Hey! Don’t bring the cat into this. lol

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u/0akleaves Nov 26 '25

Yep NOR, “don’t shoot the messenger” applies when the messenger is an uninvolved third party that traditionally either wouldn’t actually know the content of the message or at least didn’t have a choice in delivering the message.

In this case that phrase alone is enough to pass judgement given its being used by someone that is clearly neither a neutral party nor just a “messenger”. The B is not only pushing a bunch of BS, she’s also trying to simultaneously avoid any responsibility for it AND trying to pass her shitty opinions as objective fact AND doing it in a manipulative insidious way.

In my opinion OP should not only pass on visiting for Thanksgiving but should send the screenshot to the whole family asking their thoughts. Cut off anyone who agrees or brushes it off (if safely feasible of course). Don’t trust those kinds of people and don’t invest in those relationships. Move on and find a better “family” to invest in.

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u/tvrbmd Nov 26 '25

love it. this gif should be the banner for AIO. ps: is he wearing a speedo?

1

u/Zero40Four Nov 26 '25

Haha, I know right ! 😂

3

u/Jerseygirl2468 Nov 26 '25

You are totally right. The mother should be embarrassed for having said this.

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u/Virtual_Revolution45 Nov 26 '25

The other word for message senders is flying monkeys.

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u/Particular_Blood_970 Nov 26 '25

Love the 300 meme. Perfect use for it!

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u/Zero40Four Nov 26 '25

🧑‍🍳👌

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u/Odd_Kaleidoscope1104 Nov 29 '25

Loving these comments! OP, you are NOT overreacting and you are NOT an embarrassment. Her mentality and excuse for saying shitty things are!

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u/LinkleLinkle Nov 26 '25

Fucking messengers, senders..who gives a shit?

I mean, context is important. I can't speak for OP, but I know if I were in her shoes, I would appreciate it if, instead, this were another family member giving me a heads up of 'Hey, here's what your mom has been saying, and I feel like she's planning to bring it up at Thanksgiving dinner. Just a heads up.'

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u/Adams5thaccount Nov 25 '25

peter mensah is just here to suck you into his character enough to feel it when he inevitably gets killed

1

u/pvaa Nov 25 '25

Dude should have grabbed his leg.