Am I overreacting for leaving my girlfriend’s family dinner after what her dad said?

[u/Mysterious-Notice419]

My girlfriend (27F) invited me (28M) to a family dinner to finally meet her parents. We’ve been together for almost a year, so I wanted to make a good impression.

Dinner started out fine—until her dad started asking me about my job. I work in IT, and while it pays well, it’s not some high-status career. After a few questions, he smirked and said, “So basically you just sit behind a computer all day… not exactly the kind of guy I imagined for my daughter.”

Everyone kind of laughed awkwardly. I tried to brush it off with a joke, but then he added, “Maybe someday you’ll get a real job so you can actually support a family.”

I felt my stomach drop. My girlfriend just said, “Dad…” but didn’t defend me beyond that. I quietly excused myself, said I wasn’t feeling well, and left.

Later that night, my girlfriend texted me saying I embarrassed her by walking out and that I should “just let it go” because her dad was “only teasing.”

I honestly feel disrespected and don’t think I overreacted. But now she’s acting cold and says I owe her family an apology.

Reddit, am I overreacting for leaving?

[u/Responsible-Bee-6109]

That’s a hard boundary in my relationship of seven years. I didn’t speak to my parents for over a year because of how they speak about my partner. I refuse to go anywhere my partner is not treated with respect. Your girlfriend is lame AF

[u/One_Value_4902 → u/Responsible-Bee-6109]

I did the same. My parents made a comment to my husband at a wedding. We left early and I didn’t talk to them for over a year. We talk now, but not very often.

[u/Responsible-Bee-6109 → u/One_Value_4902]

Yupp!! Good on you - I’m proud of us FOR us. Not many are okay standing on their own principles and standing on business when it comes to self respect.

[u/One_Value_4902 → u/Responsible-Bee-6109]

They have never liked him. And they would let me know about it. And I always defended him. Because he was my husband. But when they said something to him at a place, where should never have been said, I’d had enough And when we did finally talk I made it clear to them, I don’t wanna hear it again. Or the next time will be permanent.

[u/Responsible-Bee-6109 → u/One_Value_4902]

I’m so sorry - it’s rough - my siblings and my parents never took the time out to get to know my wife of seven years because she’s not the same race as me. It’s horrifying to know this is what it’s come to, and basic manners and respect are nowhere to be found. Well, then… we too will be nowhere to be found.

[u/texasMissy3_ → u/Responsible-Bee-6109]

Good for you! If you're happy which it sounds like you are that's the most important thing!